¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Do you think bullies still have the chance to change? Why or why not?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*°æ
2023-08-31 893

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

No wonder Bullies still have the chance to make amends for bullying their friends. When you feel it¡¯s too late to do it, it¡¯s the earliest time for you to start it. However, when bullies have remorse for what they did in the past and have the sincerity to repent of it, they should be as sincere as possible about it. That¡¯s because victims might have had incurable hurts in their hearts although their physical hurts could be healed.
I believe almost every juvenile delinquency might be brought about by causes coming from outside of those bullies, such as unrealistic gangster movies describing violence as a heroic deed, or a broken family. So we can solve the school violence problems by addressing the causes behind complicated youth problems. Moreover, Juvenile delinquency in our society is not a problem that can be done or not, but a problem that we should resolve for our future. Therefore, we need to control and keep our children's educational environment safe from bad influences.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Steve!

Thank you for answering your homework!

Here are some things to take note of:

1. No wonder Bullies still have the chance to make amends for bullying their friends. 
>>Bullies still have the chance to make amends for bullying their friends. 

2. When you feel it¡¯s too late to do it, it¡¯s the earliest time for you to start it. 
>>When you feel that it¡¯s too late to do it, it¡¯s actually the earliest time for you to start it. 

3. However, when bullies have remorse for what they did in the past and have the sincerity to repent of it, they should be as sincere as possible about it. 
>>CORRECT!

4. That¡¯s because victims might have had incurable hurts in their hearts although their physical hurts could be healed.
>>That¡¯s because victims might have had incurable hurts in their hearts although their physical hurts could have been healed.

5. I believe almost every juvenile delinquency might be brought about by causes coming from outside of those bullies, such as unrealistic gangster movies describing violence as a heroic deed, or a broken family.
>>I believe almost every juvenile delinquent might be brought about by causes coming from outside, such as unrealistic gangster movies describing violence as a heroic deed, or a broken family.

6. So we can solve the school violence problems by addressing the causes behind complicated youth problems. 
>>We can solve the school violence problems by addressing the causes behind the complicated youth problems. 

7. Moreover, Juvenile delinquency in our society is not a problem that can be done or not, but a problem that we should resolve for our future. 
>>Moreover, Juvenile delinquency in our society is a problem that we should resolve for our future. 

8. Therefore, we need to control and keep our children's educational environment safe from bad influences.
>>CORRECT!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
132242 What do you hope for your own future? ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-11-07 1
132241 What do you think are the cultural differences between Ulsan and... ¿À*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-07 0
132240 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-11-07 1854
132239 HOMEWORK: Please write a short paragraph about ¡°How do you show... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-11-07 2
132238 Have you ever experienced culture shock while traveling? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-11-07 1737
132237 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-11-07 1287
132236 A letter of self introduction ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-07 1445
132235 homework ¾È*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-07 868
132234 homework Á¤*¾È ¿Ï·á 2023-11-07 0
132233 How can we make our cities safer places to live? ±Ç*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-11-07 1330
132232 Survey ±Ç*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-07 1
132231 WRITING TASK: Who are you grateful for and why? ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-11-07 3
132230 A role of press ÀÓ*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-11-07 1323
132229 What do you think is the biggest change in how families are in... ½Å*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-07 972
132228 Homework Á¤*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-07 1841
132227 Why freedome of speech is important ±è*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-07 1
132226 retirement ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-07 1464
132225 homework_231106 ÇÑ*·Ï ¿Ï·á 2023-11-07 1
132224 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-06 987
132223 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-11-06 1486

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04