¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Today\'s homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*µµ
2023-08-30 1426

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

ESSAY: Nowadays, more and more people from different cities are spending more time away from their families. What are the possible reasons and the effects on the people themselves and their families?

Nowadays, people don't gather as familly. They scatter each other because of their duty.
When they marriaged people and no child, he or she can move their jobs.
He puts his wife and then go to the other cities to keep his jobs.
if they have a baby, can go to the better place for child education.
There are many things that we live different place each other.
The bad things are that it makes bad feeling such as blue, sad, lonely, and anger.
And these make family bronken.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello there Lee~!^^ You know what I want to eat kimchi now. Hahaha! I will buy later. Anyway, thank for your homework! Keep up the good work!
>>> TEACHER GEMMA
Nowadays, people don't gather as familly. 
>>> CORRECT~!^^
They scatter each other because of their duty.
>>> They're scattered in different place because of their duty.
When they marriaged people and no child, he or she can move their jobs.
>>> Unmarried people can move anywhere for their job. 
He puts his wife and then go to the other cities to keep his jobs.
>>> Fathers leave their wives then go to the other cities to keep their jobs.
if they have a baby, can go to the better place for child education.
>>> If they have children, they can choose a better place for their children's education. 
There are many things that we live different place each other.
>>> There are many reasons why we live separately from each other. 
The bad things are that it makes bad feeling such as blue, sad, lonely, and anger.
>>> The disadvantage is that it makes us feel bad, feel blue, sad, lonely and angry. 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
127346 attending ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-11 1
127345 Which part of learning English unnerves you? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-11 1005
127344 4.11 homework ±Ç*¸² ¿Ï·á 2023-04-11 746
127343 How do you feel the evening before the weekend starts? ±è*º° ¿Ï·á 2023-04-11 1
127342 Name one skill that you\'d like to learn or try in 2023. ¹Ú*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-04-11 943
127341 How can art be a part of culture? Àü*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-11 835
127340 What activities do you do in your free time? ±è*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-04-11 712
127339 4.11 Homework ¹Ú*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-11 773
127338 How does what we eat affect our mental health? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-04-11 1
127337 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-04-11 1126
127336 Recommending korean food À±*¿õ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-11 1
127335 homework 4/11 °í*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-04-11 8
127334 Learning English 2 ±Ç*ÀÏ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-11 4
127333 What do you think is the most serious health problem in Korea?... Àå*Àº ¿Ï·á 2023-04-11 907
127332 What was the most dangerous thing that you have done? Àå*Àº ¿Ï·á 2023-04-11 1002
127331 Homework ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-04-10 903
127330 The life lesson that I think everyone should know ±Ç*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-04-10 3
127329 HOMRWORK ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-04-10 0
127328 HOMRWORK ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-04-10 0
127327 wish ¹Ú*¶÷ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-10 1533

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04