¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Today\'s homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*µµ
2023-08-30 764

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

ESSAY: Nowadays, more and more people from different cities are spending more time away from their families. What are the possible reasons and the effects on the people themselves and their families?

Nowadays, people don't gather as familly. They scatter each other because of their duty.
When they marriaged people and no child, he or she can move their jobs.
He puts his wife and then go to the other cities to keep his jobs.
if they have a baby, can go to the better place for child education.
There are many things that we live different place each other.
The bad things are that it makes bad feeling such as blue, sad, lonely, and anger.
And these make family bronken.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello there Lee~!^^ You know what I want to eat kimchi now. Hahaha! I will buy later. Anyway, thank for your homework! Keep up the good work!
>>> TEACHER GEMMA
Nowadays, people don't gather as familly. 
>>> CORRECT~!^^
They scatter each other because of their duty.
>>> They're scattered in different place because of their duty.
When they marriaged people and no child, he or she can move their jobs.
>>> Unmarried people can move anywhere for their job. 
He puts his wife and then go to the other cities to keep his jobs.
>>> Fathers leave their wives then go to the other cities to keep their jobs.
if they have a baby, can go to the better place for child education.
>>> If they have children, they can choose a better place for their children's education. 
There are many things that we live different place each other.
>>> There are many reasons why we live separately from each other. 
The bad things are that it makes bad feeling such as blue, sad, lonely, and anger.
>>> The disadvantage is that it makes us feel bad, feel blue, sad, lonely and angry. 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
130760 In the exam! ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-09-05 891
130759 9/4 homework À±*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-09-05 931
130758 8-31 homework ±è*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-04 1
130757 What do you do to encourage yourself during hard times? Is it... ±è*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-04 742
130756 Homework ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-09-04 654
130755 What do you think are the most important qualities for a... ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-09-04 1
130754 Homework Àü*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-04 9
130753 What do you usually do on New Year\'s Day? È«*±â ¿Ï·á 2023-09-04 567
130752 Introduction our things ¼º*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-04 561
130751 Can you talk about what a typical day at your current job is... ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-04 4
130750 Do you think homeschooling hinders a child\'s development? ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-09-04 2
130749 homework 09.04 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2023-09-04 327
130748 Someone once said: \"Conversation is an exercise of the mind;... ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-04 7
130747 Do you help your parents by doing housework? ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-09-04 748
130746 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-09-04 633
130745 Would you rather be able to teleport or read minds? ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-09-04 455
130744 Do you think scientists will produce a mechanical heart one day... ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-09-04 4
130743 Homework ±è* ¿Ï·á 2023-09-04 0
130742 I want durian ÀÌ*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-04 494
130741 Choose the company\'s growth and success. ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-09-04 737

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04