¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Àå*¼®
2023-08-29 582

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

HOMEWORK for 06/28
Write 5-10 sentences
TOPIC: How do you try to achieve the goals that you have? Do you feel any pressure in doing it? Why do you think so?


I have many goals amomg that I want freedom of money so I have to working and I feel pressure for my goal like if I don't successfully? maybe a lot of people around me they will not live to me?

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello, Min Seog! I would like to thank you for always doing your homework diligently. You are getting better in communicating your ideas as clearly as possible. Let's just continue to work on more in all aspects of your skills in English. See you in class! ~ T. Marie ^^ 
I have many goals amomg that I want freedom of money so I have to working and I feel pressure for my goal like if I don't successfully? 
>> I have many goals.
>> Among them, I want to have financial freedom, so I have to work hard. 
>> I can feel the pressure for my goal, like what I am not successful?
maybe a lot of people around me they will not live to me?
>> Maybe a lot of people around would not like to live with me? 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
130982 Homework ±è* ¿Ï·á 2023-09-12 0
130981 Homework ±è* ¿Ï·á 2023-09-12 0
130980 homework ¾È*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-12 726
130979 What is your favorite thing in your bedroom and why? ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-12 0
130978 Homework ±è*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-12 559
130977 HOMEWORK: Please write a short paragraph about \"Who makes you... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-09-12 1
130976 Homework Á¤*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-12 3
130975 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-09-12 427
130974 Homework JA*UNG CHUNG ¿Ï·á 2023-09-12 406
130973 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-09-12 0
130972 HOMEWORK-230912 ¾ç*¾Ö ¿Ï·á 2023-09-12 1
130971 Today\'s homework ÀÌ*µµ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-12 833
130970 Essay Homework È«*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-09-12 1
130969 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-09-12 0
130968 Three sentences using ¡®squeeze something in¡¯ ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-09-12 696
130967 WRITING TASK: What is the first thing you do when you travel... ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-09-12 2
130966 When do you prefer to have a family gathering? ÀÌ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2023-09-12 865
130965 . ¼Û*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-09-12 4
130964 Can you describe a recent experience that taught you something... ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-09-12 643
130963 Why do some people panic in a situation when other people remain... ÀÌ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-09-12 719

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04