¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

How can we possibly reduce the number of delinquents in the world?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*°æ
2023-08-29 1372

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Above all, contemporary youngsters get a flood of information on delinquents from around them. Young people are more likely to follow suit without discernment than older generations and we need to control the environment that influences them. For example, recently gangster movies or webtoons have popular in Korea, and the young generation can watch them without difficulty. On top of that, we need to teach kids how to obey parents and teachers. Now, in a classroom in Korea, the rights of students overpower the rights of teachers so teachers can¡¯t even use corporal punishment as a tool of discipline. When teachers discipline students for their wrongdoing, teachers have to walk on the eggshells around students. What a situation! We Koreans used to be admired as polite people and those who respected elders for a long time. But now far from it. Who is to blame? Now, what we did wrong has been turned out around us, let alone in a classroom. It is a time for us to think about education.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Steve!

Thank you for answering your homework!

Here are some things to take note of:

1. Above all, contemporary youngsters get a flood of information on delinquents from around them. 
>>Contemporary youngsters get a flood of information on delinquents from around them.

2. Young people are more likely to follow suit without discernment than older generations and we need to control the environment that influences them.
>>CORRECT! 

3. For example, recently gangster movies or webtoons have popular in Korea, and the young generation can watch them without difficulty. 
>>For example, recently, gangster movies or webtoons have become popular in Korea, and the young generation can watch them without difficulty. 

4. On top of that, we need to teach kids how to obey parents and teachers. 
>>CORRECT!

5. Now, in a classroom in Korea, the rights of students overpower the rights of teachers so teachers can¡¯t even use corporal punishment as a tool of discipline. 
>>Now, in a classroom in Korea, the rights of the students overpower the rights of the teachers so teachers can¡¯t even use corporal punishment as a tool for discipline. 

6. When teachers discipline students for their wrongdoing, teachers have to walk on the eggshells around students. What a situation! 
>>CORRECT!

7. We Koreans used to be admired as polite people and those who respected elders for a long time. 
>>We Koreans used to be admired as polite people and respectful to elders for a long time. 

8. But now far from it. 
>>But now we are far from it.

9. Now, what we did wrong has been turned out around us, let alone in a classroom. 
>>Now, what we did has turned out to be against us, let alone in a classroom.

10. It is a time for us to think about education.
>>It's about time for us to think about reforming education.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
128190 Are gender roles changing in your country? ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2023-05-13 2
128189 Are we all born with the same level of intelligence? ±Ç*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-05-13 2
128188 What do the clothes someone wears say about that person? ±Ç*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-05-13 2
128187 Do you think that teachers should have a higher pay than... ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-05-13 2
128186 homework 5/10 ¹æ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-05-12 3
128185 homework 05.12 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2023-05-12 1072
128184 What is your favorite movie and why? ¹è*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2023-05-12 1088
128183 Do you think the bill in question violates children\'s human... ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-05-12 4
128182 What makes you happy? ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-05-12 1044
128181 My best birthday gift ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-05-12 998
128180 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-05-12 0
128179 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-05-12 0
128178 How do you show your love to your sister? ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-05-12 0
128177 Who is the person you would like to be stranded with on a... ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-05-12 1009
128176 Homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2023-05-12 0
128175 What does ¡°inner beauty¡± mean to you? Do you consider... ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-05-12 842
128174 I think the people\'s born in the world have seen intelligence... À±*Çý ¿Ï·á 2023-05-12 816
128173 What are some possible compromises that can be made between... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2023-05-12 920
128172 Gardening ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-05-12 1031
128171 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-05-12 903

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04