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영작교정 게시판

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자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
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담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

How do we make sure that we are not compromising our health while having a diet?

작성자: 김*경
2023-08-29 1963

회원님의 영작문

First of all, we need to check where the food came from to make sure of the safety of our diet on the table. Our family is more likely to have domestic ingredients than those from abroad. Second, we are to be more cautious about how to make it. Meals overcooked or grilled over a fire look good but don’t do good for your health. Third, when to have meals is something you mustn’t overlook. Many doctors advise keeping your stomach empty for as much as about 15 hours every day. To do so, you need to be done with your dinner by 7 p.m. and skip breakfast the next day. You can maintain an empty stomach for about 17 hours. We Koreans call it intermittent fasting. So many people around me are implementing this, benefiting a nice shape from it. I am counted in here. It may sound strange that fasting is in vogue in the age of abundance, but in fact we don't seem to be designed to eat a lot of food, but to share it with the needy.
Anyway, we can be much healthier with some tips above.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hi, Steve!

Thank you for answering your homework!

~T. Divina^^

Here are some things to take note of:

1. First of all, we need to check where the food came from to make sure of the safety of our diet on the table. 
>>CORRECT!

2. Our family is more likely to have domestic ingredients than those from abroad. 
>>Our family is more likely to have local ingredients than those from abroad. 

3. Second, we are to be more cautious about how to make it. 
>>Second, we should be more cautious on how to make it.

4. Meals overcooked or grilled over a fire look good but don’t do good for your health. 
>>Meals that are overcooked or grilled over fire look good but don’t do good for our health. 

5. Third, when to have meals is something you mustn’t overlook. 
>>Third, a meal schedule is something we mustn’t overlook. 

6. Many doctors advise keeping your stomach empty for as much as about 15 hours every day. 
>>Many doctors advise keeping our stomach empty for as long as 15 hours every day. 

7. To do so, you need to be done with your dinner by 7 p.m. and skip breakfast the next day. 
>>CORRECT!

8. You can maintain an empty stomach for about 17 hours. 
>>CORRECT!

9. We Koreans call it intermittent fasting. 
>>We, Koreans, call it intermittent fasting. 

10. So many people around me are implementing this, benefiting a nice shape from it. I am counted in here. 
>>So many people around me are implementing and benefiting a nice shape from it. I am one of those people.

11. It may sound strange that fasting is in vogue in the age of abundance, but in fact we don't seem to be designed to eat a lot of food, but to share it with the needy.
>>It may sound strange that fasting is in vogue in the age of abundance. In fact we don't seem to be designed to eat a lot of food. Instead, we should share it with the needy.

12. Anyway, we can be much healthier with some tips above.
>>CORRECT!
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