¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Today\'s homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*µµ
2023-08-28 822

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

***********************
HOMEWORK FOR TODAY:
ESSAY: Fast food is a part of life in many places. Some people think this has bad effects on lifestyle and diets. Do you agree or disagree?

Fast food is bad for our body. But it must not be bad for our life.
For example hamburger is good food for diet. it includes healthy food such as lettuce, tomato, and beef.
These things make nutritional balance. The french fry just makes our body bad.
The other example is pizza. Pizza is a Italy traditional food. and these aren't a result that Italy people are sick for pizza.
Frankly, American pizza that need more bad ingredient are gaining weight. are not Italy pizza.
In sort, some fast food make us bad clearly. But there is a good fast food for out life obviously.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi there Lee~!^^ You are an enthusiastic learner who seems to enjoy writing! You appear well rested and ready for each essay question. 
See you~!^^
>>> TEACHER GEMMA
Fast food is bad for our body.
>>> CORRECT~!^^
 But it must not be bad for our life.
>>> CORRECT~!^^
For example hamburger is good food for diet.
>>> CORRECT~!^^
 It includes healthy food such as lettuce, tomato, and beef.
>>> CORRECT~!^^
These things make nutritional balance.
>>> CORRECT~!^^
OR>>> These comprise nutritional balance.
The french fry just makes our body bad.
>>> French fries makes the body unhealthy. 
The other example is pizza. 
>>> CORRECT~!^^
Pizza is a Italy traditional food.
>>> Pizza is Italy's traditional food.
 and these aren't a result that Italy people are sick for pizza.
>>>  These don't make Italians get sick.
>>>  Eating pizza doesn't Italians get sick.
Frankly, American pizza that need more bad ingredient are gaining weight. are not Italy pizza.
>>> To be honest, America's pizza has unhealthy ingredients not Italy's. 
In sort, some fast food make us bad clearly.
>>> In short, some fast food makes our body unhealthy. 
 But there is a good fast food for our life obviously.
>>> CORRECT~!^^
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
131512 electricity is a very good invention. À±*Çý ¿Ï·á 2023-10-09 1317
131511 How do you usually solve a stressful situation? Share your... ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-10-09 1
131510 My favorite character is always trying for dreams and taking... À±*Çý ¿Ï·á 2023-10-09 2066
131509 I don\'t know. À±*Çý ¿Ï·á 2023-10-09 1647
131508 WRITING TASK: What kind of meeting do you always want to attend? ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-10-09 4
131507 Soccer ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-10-09 1998
131506 Letter ±Ç*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-09 1
131505 Today\'s homework ÀÌ*µµ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-08 1744
131504 Homework Á¤*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-08 2675
131503 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-10-08 1835
131502 How was my fishing ÃÖ*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-08 1875
131501 A few extra hours in a day ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-10-08 1778
131500 Making a reservation. ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-08 0
131499 Trip ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-08 1
131498 HOMEWORK-231006 ¾ç*¾Ö ¿Ï·á 2023-10-08 1
131497 homwork ¹Ú*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-07 2
131496 Describe a party you attended. ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-10-07 1
131495 Are ther any books that have had a profound impact on your life... ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-10-07 2015
131494 Are you happy with the programs on TV nowadays? ±è*¼ø ¿Ï·á 2023-10-06 1868
131493 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-06 2356

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04