¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Today\'s homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*µµ
2023-08-28 857

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

***********************
HOMEWORK FOR TODAY:
ESSAY: Fast food is a part of life in many places. Some people think this has bad effects on lifestyle and diets. Do you agree or disagree?

Fast food is bad for our body. But it must not be bad for our life.
For example hamburger is good food for diet. it includes healthy food such as lettuce, tomato, and beef.
These things make nutritional balance. The french fry just makes our body bad.
The other example is pizza. Pizza is a Italy traditional food. and these aren't a result that Italy people are sick for pizza.
Frankly, American pizza that need more bad ingredient are gaining weight. are not Italy pizza.
In sort, some fast food make us bad clearly. But there is a good fast food for out life obviously.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi there Lee~!^^ You are an enthusiastic learner who seems to enjoy writing! You appear well rested and ready for each essay question. 
See you~!^^
>>> TEACHER GEMMA
Fast food is bad for our body.
>>> CORRECT~!^^
 But it must not be bad for our life.
>>> CORRECT~!^^
For example hamburger is good food for diet.
>>> CORRECT~!^^
 It includes healthy food such as lettuce, tomato, and beef.
>>> CORRECT~!^^
These things make nutritional balance.
>>> CORRECT~!^^
OR>>> These comprise nutritional balance.
The french fry just makes our body bad.
>>> French fries makes the body unhealthy. 
The other example is pizza. 
>>> CORRECT~!^^
Pizza is a Italy traditional food.
>>> Pizza is Italy's traditional food.
 and these aren't a result that Italy people are sick for pizza.
>>>  These don't make Italians get sick.
>>>  Eating pizza doesn't Italians get sick.
Frankly, American pizza that need more bad ingredient are gaining weight. are not Italy pizza.
>>> To be honest, America's pizza has unhealthy ingredients not Italy's. 
In sort, some fast food make us bad clearly.
>>> In short, some fast food makes our body unhealthy. 
 But there is a good fast food for our life obviously.
>>> CORRECT~!^^
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
131874 Why do so many people love traveling? ½Å*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-24 1841
131873 homework Á¤*¾È ¿Ï·á 2023-10-24 1
131872 WRITING TASK: What is the best place for a picnic? ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-10-24 3
131871 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-10-24 0
131870 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-10-24 0
131869 In your case, how do you usually celebrate Christmas? ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-24 2
131868 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-10-24 0
131867 How to influence ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-24 1047
131866 hello ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-24 3
131865 tour ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-24 1259
131864 Have you ever planned to work in a hospital? ·ù*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2023-10-24 3
131863 Do you like attending family gatherings? ·ù*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2023-10-24 3
131862 23.Oct.2023 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-24 1
131861 Are there any special holidays or celebrations that people might... ÀÌ*ºó ¿Ï·á 2023-10-24 1680
131860 HOMEWORK _1 ¼Û*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-24 1253
131859 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-10-23 1
131858 ¡°Half of writing history is hiding the truth.¡± What do you... ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-10-23 2
131857 homework 10.23 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2023-10-23 1412
131856 homework_231023 ÇÑ*·Ï ¿Ï·á 2023-10-23 1842
131855 Homework ±è* ¿Ï·á 2023-10-23 0

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04