¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Today\'s homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*µµ
2023-08-28 488

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

***********************
HOMEWORK FOR TODAY:
ESSAY: Fast food is a part of life in many places. Some people think this has bad effects on lifestyle and diets. Do you agree or disagree?

Fast food is bad for our body. But it must not be bad for our life.
For example hamburger is good food for diet. it includes healthy food such as lettuce, tomato, and beef.
These things make nutritional balance. The french fry just makes our body bad.
The other example is pizza. Pizza is a Italy traditional food. and these aren't a result that Italy people are sick for pizza.
Frankly, American pizza that need more bad ingredient are gaining weight. are not Italy pizza.
In sort, some fast food make us bad clearly. But there is a good fast food for out life obviously.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi there Lee~!^^ You are an enthusiastic learner who seems to enjoy writing! You appear well rested and ready for each essay question. 
See you~!^^
>>> TEACHER GEMMA
Fast food is bad for our body.
>>> CORRECT~!^^
 But it must not be bad for our life.
>>> CORRECT~!^^
For example hamburger is good food for diet.
>>> CORRECT~!^^
 It includes healthy food such as lettuce, tomato, and beef.
>>> CORRECT~!^^
These things make nutritional balance.
>>> CORRECT~!^^
OR>>> These comprise nutritional balance.
The french fry just makes our body bad.
>>> French fries makes the body unhealthy. 
The other example is pizza. 
>>> CORRECT~!^^
Pizza is a Italy traditional food.
>>> Pizza is Italy's traditional food.
 and these aren't a result that Italy people are sick for pizza.
>>>  These don't make Italians get sick.
>>>  Eating pizza doesn't Italians get sick.
Frankly, American pizza that need more bad ingredient are gaining weight. are not Italy pizza.
>>> To be honest, America's pizza has unhealthy ingredients not Italy's. 
In sort, some fast food make us bad clearly.
>>> In short, some fast food makes our body unhealthy. 
 But there is a good fast food for our life obviously.
>>> CORRECT~!^^
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
130740 Have you ever seen a real gun? ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-04 5
130739 HOMEWORK-230904 ¾ç*¾Ö ¿Ï·á 2023-09-04 2
130738 Are policemen powerful in your country? Why or why not? ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-04 858
130737 HOMEWORK: Please write a short paragraph about \"If I become a... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-09-04 4
130736 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-04 638
130735 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-09-04 926
130734 2 ÀÌ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2023-09-04 472
130733 Homework JA*UNG CHUNG ¿Ï·á 2023-09-04 436
130732 Homework-which greeting kind of annoys you? ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-04 353
130731 How do you calm yourself in stressful situations? ±è*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-04 3
130730 WRITING TASK: What can you do for your mother? ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-09-04 4
130729 Today\'s homework ÀÌ*µµ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-04 643
130728 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-04 640
130727 Avoiding and choosing the group ÃÖ*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-04 527
130726 Would you rather live in a house or an apartment? ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-04 966
130725 What do you do when you hear your name pop up in other people¡¯s... ÀÌ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-09-04 1330
130724 How many hours do you spend reading in a week? ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-04 0
130723 ESSAY ±Ç*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-04 2
130722 Did you have any interactions with the attendees that stood out... ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-09-04 1
130721 9/1 homework À±*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-09-04 613

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04