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Where would you like to go for an adventure?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*À±
2023-08-26 1903

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Where would you like to go for an adventure : a jungle, a desert, or a small island? Why?

I want to go to a small island for an adventure.
I like water. But, I don't like hot weather. And I hate insects, bugs, mosquitoes, etc.
That's why I want to go to a small island with a sea that is favorite and cool.
To be more precise, I want to explore the deep sea.
I was usually interested in the deep sea.
I want to watch marine life while scuba diving there.
I also want to self-sufficient.
Because Korea has improved a lot, but there is still a perception that "You can't do because you're a woman."
I don't agree with this perception and think it is unfair. Also, I think it's an outdated perception.
I want to break that perception. Then I think I will become more independent and high self-esteem person.
So I want to challenge myself a lot.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Yun! Your aim to break the stigma about the perception that women shouldn't be able to do things just because they are women is commendable. I highly agree and salute you for that. You are indeed a strong, powerful, and independent woman, Yun. ^^ On the other hand, visiting a small island would certainly suit you, since you love exploring the deep sea. I hope you'll be able to do it soon! Thank you for completing your homework. See you in our class.
~T. Jade^^
Where would you like to go for an adventure : a jungle, a desert, or a small island? Why?
I want to go to a small island for an adventure.
>> Correct
I like water. 
>> Correct
But I don't like hot weather. 
>> Correct
And I hate insects, bugs, mosquitoes, etc.
>> Correct
>> OR: I like water, but I don't like hot weather, and I hate insects, bugs, mosquitoes, etc.
That's why I want to go to a small island with a sea that is favorite and cool.
>> That's why I want to go to a small island with a sea because that's my favorite scenery and I think it's cool.
>> OR: That's why I want to go to a small island with a sea, as it's my favorite scenery and I find it cool.
To be more precise, I want to explore the deep sea.
>> Correct
I was usually interested in the deep sea.
>> Correct
I want to watch marine life while scuba diving there.
>> Correct
I also want to self-sufficient.
>> I also want to be self-sufficient.
Because Korea has improved a lot, but there is still a perception that "You can't do because you're a woman."
>> Korea has improved a lot, but there is still a perception that "You can't do that because you're a woman."
I don't agree with this perception and think it is unfair. 
>> Correct
Also, I think it's an outdated perception.
>> Correct
I want to break that perception. 
>> Correct
>> OR: I want to change that perception. 
Then I think I will become more independent and high self-esteem person.
>> Then I think I will become a more independent person with high self-esteem.
So I want to challenge myself a lot.
>> Correct
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