¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¿µ
2023-08-25 1739

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Mental health is more important than mental health. Even if you are physically healthy, you wouldn't get a healthy life if your mind is not healthy. For example, if the mind is not healthy, it can have various mental illnesses such as insomnia or anxiety disorders. On the other hand, if the mind is healthy, physical health can be created anytime. You can become overall healthy by exercising or doing various activities.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Thank you for this Na Young!

Mental health is more important than mental health. 
>>>  Mental health is more important than physical health. 
Even if you are physically healthy, you wouldn't get a healthy life if your mind is not healthy. 
>>> correct  
For example, if the mind is not healthy, it can have various mental illnesses such as insomnia or anxiety disorders. 
>>>  correct 
>>> OR: For example, if the mind is not healthy, it can lead to various mental illnesses such as insomnia or anxiety disorders.   
On the other hand, if the mind is healthy, physical health can be created anytime. 
>>>   correct 
>>> OR: On the other hand, if the mind is healthy, physical health will follow. 
>>> OR: On the other hand, if the mind is healthy, physical health can be improved.   
You can become overall healthy by exercising or doing various activities.
>>>   correct 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
130776 Homework- 230905 PART1 ¾ç*¾Ö ¿Ï·á 2023-09-05 3
130775 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-09-05 1471
130774 Homework ±è* ¿Ï·á 2023-09-05 1
130773 Homework JA*UNG CHUNG ¿Ï·á 2023-09-05 856
130772 HOMEWORK: Writing Exercise: How do you manage your workweek and... ¼­*ÅÃ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-05 1808
130771 HOMEWORK: Writing Exercise: Would you rather live in a house or... ¼­*ÅÃ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-05 1250
130770 3 ÀÌ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2023-09-05 1055
130769 WRITING TASK: How can role models help us? ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-09-05 2
130768 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-05 1187
130767 homework ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-05 2
130766 What¡¯s the best and worst news you¡¯ve received over the phone? ±è*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-05 1
130765 When was the last time you felt like you didn\'t want to... ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-05 1120
130764 Do you think some cafes are overpriced? How can you say so? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-05 1933
130763 Is it safe to believe a pharmacist at all times? Why or why not ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-05 2550
130762 05.Sep.2023 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-05 3
130761 What do you know about the human heart? ÀÌ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-09-05 2
130760 In the exam! ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-09-05 1568
130759 9/4 homework À±*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-09-05 1394
130758 8-31 homework ±è*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-04 1
130757 What do you do to encourage yourself during hard times? Is it... ±è*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-04 1364

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04