¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What is the biggest change you\'d like to make to your life?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*°æ
2023-08-24 1699

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I have goals to achieve in my life, and I want to make big changes with these feats.
First, I want to speak English as fluently as native speakers do. I want to kick a day off with CNN or Arirang breaking news and go to my company which teaches English and develops materials that help students study English more easily and intuitively.

Second, I want to run my own business of English education and remodeling buildings. That's because I don't want to live under the protection of the company and retire at around 60 years old, ending up my life with guards of an apartment complex. Rather, I want to make use of my strength to do what I am good at - English, construction - and live my old life excitingly.

All I need to make big changes in my life is a spirit of challenge and an indomitable will to fulfill my goals until they are done. Now I am preparing them with prayers and incessant studying about English and construction. I'd have best obtain a certificate or an advanced license.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Steve,

Thank you for sharing your thoughts with me through your assignment. It's clear that you have a strong sense of purpose and determination. I want to acknowledge your commitment and remind you that your efforts are truly commendable. Your goals and aspirations reflect your dedication to personal growth and positive change. It's wonderful to see your ambition to enhance your skills and make a meaningful impact. Remember, every step you take towards your goals, no matter how small, brings you closer to achieving them. Your mindset and drive are truly praiseworthy. Keep believing in yourself and your abilities, as they will undoubtedly guide you towards success. Stay focused, keep up the good work, and know that your efforts are making a difference.

~Teacher Cathy


I have goals to achieve in my life, and I want to make big changes with these feats.

>> I have goals to achieve in my life, and I want to make significant changes with these feats.
First, I want to speak English as fluently as native speakers do.

>>CORRECT

OR>> First, I want to speak English like native speakers.

I want to kick a day off with CNN or Arirang breaking news and go to my company which teaches English and develops materials that help students study English more easily and intuitively.
>> I want to start my day by watching CNN or Arirang breaking news and then head to my company, which teaches English and develops materials to assist students in studying English more easily and intuitively.
Second, I want to run my own business of English education and remodeling buildings.

>> Secondly, I want to run my own business in English education and building remodeling.

That's because I don't want to live under the protection of the company and retire at around 60 years old, ending up my life with guards of an apartment complex.

>> That's because I don't want to live under the company's protection, retire at around 60 years old, and conclude my life in the confines of an apartment complex guarded by security personnel.

OR>> It's like this because I don't want to depend on the company's care and retire at about 60 years old, spending my life protected by an apartment complex.

Rather, I want to make use of my strength to do what I am good at - English, construction - and live my old life excitingly.
>>CORRECT

OR>> Instead, I want to leverage my strengths in what I excel at - English and construction - and lead an exciting life in my later years.
All I need to make big changes in my life is a spirit of challenge and an indomitable will to fulfill my goals until they are done.

>>CORRECT

OR>> All I need to bring about significant changes in my life is a spirit of challenge and an indomitable will to achieve my goals until they are accomplished.

Now I am preparing them with prayers and incessant studying about English and construction. I'd have best obtain a certificate or an advanced license.

>> Now I am preparing for them with prayers and continuous studying in English and construction. It would be best to obtain a certificate or an advanced license.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
132100 I don\'t think I\'m going to ask questions because homeless... À±*Çý ¿Ï·á 2023-11-01 2039
132099 Providing the things you need ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-11-01 2565
132098 I think all movies are the best. À±*Çý ¿Ï·á 2023-11-01 3595
132097 Yes, the world\'s oceans are dangerous. À±*Çý ¿Ï·á 2023-11-01 2132
132096 Pick your favorite food. Describe what you taste, smell, and... ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-01 2559
132095 Which one would you choose, live longer but suffer from more... ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-11-01 1
132094 homework ¾È*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-01 1367
132093 HOMEWORK: Please write a short paragraph about ¡°What is the... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-11-01 3
132092 Have you ever said ¡®no¡¯ when you really wanted to say ¡®yes¡¯? ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-11-01 1
132091 What musical instruments are unique to our country ¹Ú*À² ¿Ï·á 2023-11-01 1598
132090 What are some food combinations that you would like to try? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-11-01 1434
132089 WRITING TASK: What is your dream house? ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-11-01 4
132088 Homework Á¤*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-01 3
132087 How different are you from best friend? ¿À*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-01 1
132086 How do you usually make yourself feel better when you feel sick?... ÀÌ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-01 1254
132085 What is an appropriate punishment for both male sexual... ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-01 0
132084 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-11-01 1274
132083 homework ¾È*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-01 1802
132082 How would you like to be identified? ±Ç*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-11-01 1990
132081 homework Á¤*¾È ¿Ï·á 2023-11-01 1382

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04