¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What makes healthy lifestyle important?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: È«*±â
2023-08-17 2010

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I personally prefer to live a short life in good health rather than a long life in sickness. Generally people want to live not just long but also healthy, because it¡¯s related to the quality of life. And it¡¯s not only about the quality of one¡¯s life but also the quality of other¡¯s life. I¡¯m sure that my health has a lot to do with the quality of life of others I relate to such as my parents, siblings and friends as well.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Seung Ki! I agree with you. Our health is wealth. We should take good care of ourselves and for our loved ones too. See you in the class to discuss to have further discussion. Keep safe!~T. Lyn
I personally prefer to live a short life in good health rather than a long life in sickness. 
>>Personally, I prefer a short healthy life to a sickly long life.
Generally people want to live not just long but also healthy, because it¡¯s related to the quality of life. 
>>In general, people want to live long healthy lives because it is directly related to quality of life.
And it¡¯s not only about the quality of one¡¯s life but also the quality of other¡¯s life.
>>And it is not just about one person's quality of life, it's about another person's quality of life.
I¡¯m sure that my health has a lot to do with the quality of life of others I relate to such as my parents, siblings and friends as well.
>>I am convinced that my health has a lot to do with the quality of life of other people related to me, such as my parents. siblings, and friends.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
126672 Writing task ¾È*Çü ¿Ï·á 2023-03-19 550
126671 First job. Á¶*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-19 1
126670 What are the most famous businesses in your country? ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-19 1
126669 HOMEWORK ¿À*º½ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-19 4
126668 My favorite part is after school. ¿À*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-19 3
126667 Is it good to bring a lot of luggage when going on a trip? Áö* ¿Ï·á 2023-03-19 2
126666 What do you think is the scariest disease? Áö* ¿Ï·á 2023-03-19 1
126665 future education Áö*¼Ö ¿Ï·á 2023-03-19 716
126664 Robot can replace human work? Áö*¼Ö ¿Ï·á 2023-03-19 623
126663 Do reality television shows accurately depict real life? Why or... ±¸*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-03-18 793
126662 Stay over ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-18 0
126661 Use these following words in a sentence ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-03-18 841
126660 Can the government do anything to improve people\'s health? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-03-18 640
126659 The most interesting weekend during my life time ¹é*¾ð ¿Ï·á 2023-03-18 2
126658 homework ½Å*ÈÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-17 578
126657 What\'s the best way to make your friends loyal to you? ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-03-17 3
126656 Homework ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-03-17 2
126655 unit 10. homework °ø*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-03-17 467
126654 i like everything À±*Çý ¿Ï·á 2023-03-17 505
126653 \"Curiosity killed the cat.\" What\'s your thought on this... ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-03-17 3

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04