¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework 08.17

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÃÖ*Ç
2023-08-17 1017

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
What are the positive and negative ways some people choose to deal with stress?a

We face a lot of stress in daily lives.
And many people do hobbies or similar activities for reduce stress.
Most people around me, in a healthy(positive) way for reduce stress.
For example, they usually choose to work out or eat delicious food.
But, occasionally I heard through the news, some people choose the bad ways for reduce stress.
They are alcoholics.
They drink little by little to reduce stress at first time.
But, later they became an alcoholic or get sick because of alcohol.
So, I think anyone who chooses a negative ways will get more stress.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good day, Keon!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille


~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
What are the positive and negative ways some people choose to deal with stress?


We face a lot of stress in daily lives.
>> We face a lot of stress in our daily lives.
And many people do hobbies or similar activities for reduce stress.
>> And many people do hobbies or similar activities to reduce stress.
Most people around me, in a healthy(positive) way for reduce stress.
>> Most people around me reduce their stress in a healthy way.
For example, they usually choose to work out or eat delicious food.
>> CORRECT!
But, occasionally I heard through the news, some people choose the bad ways for reduce stress.
>> But, occasionally I heard through the news, some people choose the bad ways to reduce stress.
OR >> But, occasionally I heard through the news, some people choose the bad ways in reducing stress.
They are alcoholics.
>> CORRECT!
They drink little by little to reduce stress at first time.
>> CORRECT!
But, later they became an alcoholic or get sick because of alcohol.
>> But, later they become an alcoholic or get sick because of alcohol.
So, I think anyone who chooses a negative ways will get more stress.
>> So, I think anyone who chooses negative ways will get more stress.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
129400 7/10 °í*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-07-10 3
129399 homework Àå*¼® ¿Ï·á 2023-07-10 1767
129398 why is English fluency significant for you? ÀÌ*´Ã ¿Ï·á 2023-07-10 2893
129397 What is the best age to have a baby? Why? ¾ö*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-10 1474
129396 The best food for summer season in my country ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-07-09 2048
129395 How important is it for you to track your financial progress? ±¸*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-07-09 1
129394 What actions are friendly? ¾È*½Ò ¿Ï·á 2023-07-09 1455
129393 Do you think it\'s interesting to live in Incheon? Why? °­*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-09 1067
129392 Home work ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-07-09 1092
129391 What are some ways you strive to make a positive impact on the... ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-07-09 1
129390 What kinds of possible causes for having a vice? ¹®*¿í ¿Ï·á 2023-07-09 2803
129389 What is your favorite part of weddings? ¹Ú*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-09 1680
129388 HOMRWORK ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-07-09 1
129387 What did you enjoy doing as a child? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-07-08 1237
129386 sleepwalking ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-08 0
129385 Homework 7/3 ±è*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-08 1
129384 Home work ±è* ¿Ï·á 2023-07-07 1
129383 Why do some cultures mourn death and others celebrate it? ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-07-07 2
129382 james Á¶* ¿Ï·á 2023-07-07 1138
129381 homework ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2023-07-07 1091

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04