¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Focus something on my life.

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÃÖ*ȯ
2023-08-17 1656

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I think the important things in my life are health, work and happiness.
I saw the video on YouTube, he said the person who has succeed dose not become happy, the person who is happy become success. If we are happy the work and health are followed.
So I focus on my happiness and find out what kind of things make me happy.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good day, Thomas!

I could not agree more with every point you made here on your homework answer. What is the point of living if we are not happy? If we live in hell, then, it's not living life at all. So, our happiness never depends on our family, friends, or lover. It is something we create within ourselves by cultivating gratitude, compassion, and peace. If we are not happy, we cannot give this to other people. Stay happy even when you break your heart and train yourself to see the silver lining in every dark situation.

Your composition was powerful and moving. I cannot sense that your heart was broken. ^^

Thank you for your effort in sharing you experience and knowing how to be happy.

See you!

-T. Donna~

I think the important things in my life are health, work and happiness.
>> Correct!
Or: I think the important things in my life are health, work, and happiness.

I saw the video on YouTube, he said the person who has succeed dose not become happy, the person who is happy become success. If we are happy the work and health are followed.
>> I saw a video on YouTube, a man said that the person who succeeds does not become happy, the person who is happy become successful. If we are happy, the work and health are follow.

So I focus on my happiness and find out what kind of things make me happy.
>> Correct!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
127206 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-05 2
127205 What is your favorite restaurant and why? Á¶*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-04-05 1
127204 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-05 1
127203 How do you make time with your family when you have a pretty... ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-05 677
127202 4/5 homework ÃÖ*º½ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-05 883
127201 Drama ±Ç*ÀÏ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-05 2
127200 What makes me be mad ¼º*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-05 655
127199 Homework Á¤*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-05 564
127198 Favorite summer memories ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-05 701
127197 Topics that I\'m interested about Á¶*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-04-05 1
127196 What are the advantages and disadvantages of talking in person? ±è*¸§ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-05 703
127195 What do you think are the effects of school bullying/violence? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-04-05 2
127194 Bullying and violence in school is outright criminal. ÀÌ*¿õ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-04 3
127193 4.Apr.2023 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-04 1
127192 3.Apr.2023 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-04 3
127191 Homework ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-04 683
127190 Home work ±è*¶õ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-04 1
127189 Home work Á¶* ¿Ï·á 2023-04-04 561
127188 The questions ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-04 1
127187 pizza ¹Ú*¶÷ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-04 914

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04