¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework 08.15

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÃÖ*Ç
2023-08-15 1616

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
What do you do to keep fit?

Most people want to living healthy, so their do exercise or control diet for body.
And also, try to reduce stress for mental health.
In my case, I doing a few exercises.
These days I playing a tennis and riding a bicycle.
A lot are other people do weight training also good exercises, but I lost interest these days.
First of all , I need to interest when I do the work out.
And next, I eat delicious food to reduce stress for my mental.
In addition, almost every day is cheat day!
In fact, it's not good way, because the purpose of exercising disappears.
But, I get a one day's healthy mental from delicious food.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good day, Keon!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille

~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
What do you do to keep fit?


Most people want to living healthy, so their do exercise or control diet for body.
>> Most people want to live healthy, so they do exercise or do diet to control their body weight.
And also, try to reduce stress for mental health.
>> And also, they do it to reduce stress for their mental health.
In my case, I doing a few exercises.
>> In my case, I do a few exercises.
These days I play tennis and ride a bicycle.
>> These days, I playing a tennis and riding a bicycle.
A lot are other people do weight training also good exercises, but I lost interest these days.
>> There are other people who do weight training since it's also a good exercise, but I lost interest in it these days.
First of all , I need to interest when I do the work out.
>> First of all, I need to be interested in it when I do the work out.
And next, I eat delicious food to reduce stress for my mental.
>> And next, I eat delicious food to reduce stress for my mental health.
In addition, almost every day is cheat day!
>> CORRECT!
In fact, it's not good way, because the purpose of exercising disappears.
>> In fact, it's not a good way, because the purpose of exercising disappears.
But, I get a one day's healthy mental from delicious food.
>> But, I get happy for a day from eating delicious food.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
130222 homework Àå*¼® ¿Ï·á 2023-08-16 1220
130221 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-08-15 1180
130220 homework 08.15 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2023-08-15 1616
130219 Would you rather have a dog or cat? ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-08-15 1792
130218 Do you want to become famous? ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-08-15 805
130217 Would you rather go to the beach or go camping? ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-08-15 1170
130216 To hope to avoid a vice ÃÖ*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-15 817
130215 To compare Philippine and Korea beaches. ÃÖ*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-15 1
130214 The best way to overcome heartbreaking. ÃÖ*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-15 1046
130213 The best exercise for the losing weight ÃÖ*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-15 1242
130212 Homework JA*UNG CHUNG ¿Ï·á 2023-08-15 1084
130211 Why do you like reading books? ¿À*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-15 3
130210 Greeting is important! ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-08-15 1381
130209 Homework ÀÌ*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-15 1225
130208 Would you send a dish back if it did not taste good or if you... Á¶*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-08-15 1
130207 Homework ¼Û*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-15 839
130206 What should people with insomnia do? ±¸*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-08-15 986
130205 What is the advantage of using the English language? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-08-15 1412
130204 What are some ways to help you fall asleep? ±¸*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-08-15 1057
130203 How did you hear about this position? ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-08-15 871

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04