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영작교정 게시판

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자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
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담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

homework 08.14

작성자: 최*�
2023-08-14 2233

회원님의 영작문

~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
Why do you think people are afraid of getting old?

Most people don't want getting old, they want to stay young and healthy.
The last places most elderly people stay are nursing homes or hospitals.
That's why it is difficult to control body when get old.
So they have to get help from other people.
Other case is olden people have nowhere to go.
In case of Korea, olden people can use public transportation for free.
Their daily routine is sit on the subway and bus all day and look around other people.
Or their spend time with similar situation people in subway and go back home at night.
Many people think that their future will be similar to the current old people.
And sometimes watched that old people have no manners in public area.
That's why many people don't like getting old.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Good day, Keon!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille

~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
Why do you think people are afraid of getting old?

Most people don't want getting old, they want to stay young and healthy.
>> Most people don't want to get old, they want to stay young and healthy.
The last places most elderly people stay are nursing homes or hospitals.
>> CORRECT!
That's why it is difficult to control body when get old.
>> That's why it is difficult to control our bodies as we get old.
So they have to get help from other people.
>> CORRECT!
Other case is olden people have nowhere to go.
>> In other cases, some old people have nowhere to go.
In case of Korea, olden people can use public transportation for free.
>> In case of Korea, old people can use public transportation for free.
OR >> In case of Korea, senior citizens can use public transportation for free.
Their daily routine is sit on the subway and bus all day and look around other people.
>> Their daily routine is to sit on the subway and bus all day and look at other people.
Or their spend time with similar situation people in subway and go back home at night.
>> Sometimes, they spend time with similar situation with people in subway and go back home at night.
Many people think that their future will be similar to the current old people.
>> CORRECT!
And sometimes watched that old people have no manners in public area.
>> And sometimes, they think that watching old people isn't good.
That's why many people don't like getting old.
>> CORRECT!
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[마이페이지 > 수업 내용 보기 > 학습 캘린더 > 영작교정 버튼 클릭]

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지난 날짜에도 게시 할 수 있습니다.

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01
교정 내용은 최대 1,000byte까지 올릴 수 있습니다.

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첨삭이 가능하며,

올려주신 글의 강사님 첨삭은 24시간 이내에
완료 되는 것을 원칙으로 하고 있습니다.
03
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04

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