¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

human right

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±Ç*Èñ
2023-08-10 1885

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

The regard of human right is distorted in Korean society.

Historically there were many dictators who limited abd suppressed human rights for long time.

Ironically now the human rights of good people are threatened by criminal, disruptor, and harmers.

Protecting all criminals is the law of human rights.

The problem is not respecting other's human rights.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Ms. Lily!
How are you? Thank you for giving answers to my questions.
I appreciate your effort in writing your composition.
Stay safe and well.
Aki~

The regard of human right is distorted in Korean society.
>>> The regard of human rights is distorted in Korean society.

Historically there were many dictators who limited abd suppressed human rights for long time.
>>> Historically there were many dictators who limited and suppressed human rights for a long time.

Ironically now the human rights of good people are threatened by criminal, disruptor, and harmers.
>>> Ironically now the human rights of good people are threatened by criminals, disruptors, and harmers.

Protecting all criminals is the law of human rights.
>>> CORRECT!

The problem is not respecting others' human rights.
>>> CORRECT!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
128787 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-12 1069
128786 Writing task ¾È*Çü ¿Ï·á 2023-06-12 994
128785 Dining out with a group of friends ÃÖ*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-12 1062
128784 alarm ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-12 1083
128783 Please use the word \"birthday\" in a sentence. ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-12 0
128782 Hello ÀÓ*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-06-12 0
128781 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-06-12 949
128780 Grammar ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-11 1
128779 Homework 6/9 ±è*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-11 3
128778 Homework 6/7 ±è*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-11 2
128777 What are your thoughts about child labor? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-06-10 1
128776 What makes productivity effective? ±¸*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-06-10 1
128775 homework ¾È*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-10 1298
128774 Would you rather live in a city or in a rural area? ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-10 1
128773 homework 06.09 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2023-06-09 1451
128772 Parenting skills! ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-06-09 1435
128771 homework ¾È*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-09 797
128770 Writing Task 0609 À¯*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-09 1
128769 My favorite month ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-06-09 1222
128768 What outdoor activity is most interesting for you? ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-06-09 1127

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04