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영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

Homework

작성자: 김*우
2023-08-09 1865

회원님의 영작문

Hello.
I was so glad to see you.
You looked so energetic, so I could enjoy the class.
You have a plenty of positive energy as I heard from my wife.
That's why I decided to change my teacher to you.
Luckily, I could find the vacant time in the morning class of you.
As I told you, I am a doctor, and I graduated at Foreign language high school, expecially English dept.
However, I can't do English well.
I want to be a man who speaks, listens to and reads English fluently.
I dream that I could listen to CNN someday.
Also, I want to lecture to foreign doctors about dermatology or aesthetics.
Is it possible?
Writing task:
When someone wants to get promoted or raise salary, he or she trys to do the job actively.
It gives more productivity to the company includes my clinic.
If so, there is no reason not to promote or raise salary the staff.
There are many acitve staff in my clinic.
When they work during 3, 6 and 12 months, Dr.MJ and I always consider the promotion and salary raise.
See you.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Thank you for this Dr. Kim. 
English fluency is definitely possible. It may be difficult, challenging or even would take time, but very possible. The only thing is, people have different timeline on improvement and mastery of a language. It could depend on how much effort they put in it, the practice they do and the exposure they have. Good luck!

Hello.
>>> correct   
I was so glad to see you.
>>>correct     
You looked so energetic, so I could enjoy the class.
>>> correct   
>>> OR: correct     
You have a plenty of positive energy as I heard from my wife.
>>> You have plenty of positive energy as I heard from my wife.  
>>> OR: You are filled with positive energy as what I heard from my wife.
That's why I decided to change my teacher to you.
>>> correct  
Luckily, I could find the vacant time in the morning class of you.
>>>  Luckily, I could find the vacant time of yours in the morning class.
As I told you, I am a doctor, and I graduated at Foreign language high school, expecially English dept.
>>> As I told you, I am a doctor, and I graduated from a foreign language high school, specifically the English dept.  
However, I can't do English well.
>>> OR: However, I am not fluent with the English language.
I want to be a man who speaks, listens to and reads English fluently.
>>> correct  
I dream that I could listen to CNN someday.
>>>  correct    
Also, I want to lecture to foreign doctors about dermatology or aesthetics.
>>> OR: Also, I want to give a lecture to foreign doctors about dermatology or aesthetics.  
Is it possible?
>>>  correct 
Writing task:
When someone wants to get promoted or raise salary, he or she trys to do the job actively.
>>> When someone wants to get promoted or get a salary increase, he or she tries to do the job actively.  
It gives more productivity to the company includes my clinic.
>>>  It gives more productivity to the company including my clinic. 
If so, there is no reason not to promote or raise salary the staff.
>>> If so, there is no reason not to promote or raise salary for the staff.  
There are many acitve staff in my clinic.
>>>  There are many productive staffs in my clinic. 
When they work during 3, 6 and 12 months, Dr.MJ and I always consider the promotion and salary raise.
>>>  When they work for 3, 6 and 12 months, Dr. MJ and I always consider the promotion and salary increase. 
See you.
>>>  correct 
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