¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Today\'s homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*µµ
2023-08-05 2018

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

HOMEWORK FOR TODAY:
ESSAY: Some people believe that money is the major source of happiness. Do you agree or disagree?

I agree with this opinion. Money is one of the most important source of happiness.
But, It must be method, don't have to be result.
Money is the better component than other option but, it isn't the best component in our life.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Lee! Thanks for doing your essay. I hope you'll have a great week!
>>> TEACHER GEMMA
I agree with this opinion. 
>>> CORRECT~!^^
Money is one of the most important sources of happiness.
>>> CORRECT~!^^
But, It must be method, don't have to be result.
>>> But, it has to be used in a more reasonable way.
Money is the better component than the other option but, it isn't the best component in our life.
>>> CORRECT~!^^
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
123135 What do you like to do at parties? ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-21 1
123134 10/21 HOMEWORK+ ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-21 2073
123133 10/21 HOMEWORK+ ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-21 2800
123132 10/21 HOMEWORK+ ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-21 1745
123131 What do you think is the difference between a picnic and camping? Àü*ä ¿Ï·á 2022-10-20 3234
123130 10/20 homework À±*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-10-20 2164
123129 make sentence ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-20 1564
123128 vacation ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-20 1714
123127 social ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-20 1221
123126 Place ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-20 2284
123125 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-20 1392
123124 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-10-20 0
123123 Homework Á¤*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-20 2464
123122 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-10-20 0
123121 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-10-20 2712
123120 Homework ¼Û*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-10-20 1967
123119 homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-10-20 2
123118 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-20 1987
123117 Who is the best person to talk to when you have the blues? ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-20 2005
123116 About the trip! ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-10-20 2094

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04