¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Today\'s homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*µµ
2023-08-05 2170

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

HOMEWORK FOR TODAY:
ESSAY: Some people believe that money is the major source of happiness. Do you agree or disagree?

I agree with this opinion. Money is one of the most important source of happiness.
But, It must be method, don't have to be result.
Money is the better component than other option but, it isn't the best component in our life.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Lee! Thanks for doing your essay. I hope you'll have a great week!
>>> TEACHER GEMMA
I agree with this opinion. 
>>> CORRECT~!^^
Money is one of the most important sources of happiness.
>>> CORRECT~!^^
But, It must be method, don't have to be result.
>>> But, it has to be used in a more reasonable way.
Money is the better component than the other option but, it isn't the best component in our life.
>>> CORRECT~!^^
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
121526 What makes you a good friend? Is it easy for you to make friends? ÃÖ*±³ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-11 966
121525 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-08-11 1
121524 Thursday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-08-11 886
121523 1. How often do you use the internet? ¹Ú*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-11 604
121522 homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-08-11 894
121521 homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-08-11 610
121520 homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-08-11 818
121519 What have you experienced as the benefits or detriments of being... ±Ç*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-08-11 822
121518 Are you in favor/against the government¡¯s plan to lower the... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-11 621
121517 homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-08-11 0
121516 Haunted house ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-11 3
121515 Homework ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-08-11 703
121514 Homework ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-08-11 1346
121513 Homework ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-08-11 1018
121512 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-11 2
121511 homework ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-08-11 2
121510 homework ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-08-11 1
121509 life expectancy ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-11 689
121508 Should parents help their children set goals? Àü*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-11 2
121507 It seeme like a family birthday party. ¹Ú*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-11 1014

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04