¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

In your opinion, what is insomnia? Please give its pros (if it has) and cons.

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*°æ
2023-08-05 1112

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Insomnia is a sleep disorder where people have difficulty falling asleep and staying asleep as long as desired. Insomnia can last a few days or months depending its seriousness. If you are in insomnia, you need to treat it as soon as possible because insomnia is usually followed by daytime sleepiness, low energy and often a drepssed mind. Statistically, old men are more susceptible to insomnia than young men and females are more vulnerable than male. So It takes old men and women more care to prevent insomnia than young people and males respectively.

If you have someone with early stage symptoms of insomnia or in insomnia around you, you need to be careful because insomnia is reported to be affected by genetics to some extent. If you're already in insomnia, doctors advise not to rely on sleeping pills for long-term use for no reason. They suggest that it is very important to identify and treat medical conditions contributing to insomnia, such as depression and breathing problems.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Great job, Steve! Thank you for doing your homework religiously. Continue to practice and if you have some questions, feel free to ask me. Thank you and see you in class! ~ T.Gelly


Insomnia is a sleep disorder where people have difficulty falling asleep and staying asleep as long as desired. 
>> Insomnia is a sleep disorder where people have difficulty falling asleep and staying asleep as long as desired. 
Insomnia can last a few days or months depending its seriousness. 
>> Correct!
OR
>> It can last for a few days or even months depending on how serious it is.
If you are in insomnia, you need to treat it as soon as possible because insomnia is usually followed by daytime sleepiness, low energy and often a drepssed mind. 
>> If you have insomnia, you need to treat it as soon as possible because it is usually followed by daytime drowsiness, weary and often mind depression.
Statistically, old men are more susceptible to insomnia than young men and females are more vulnerable than male. 
>> Statistically, old men are more susceptible to insomnia than young men and females are more vulnerable than males.
So It takes old men and women more care to prevent insomnia than young people and males respectively.
>> So it takes older men and women more attention to prevent insomnia than young people and males.
If you have someone with early stage symptoms of insomnia or in insomnia around you, you need to be careful because insomnia is reported to be affected by genetics to some extent. 
>> Suppose you know someone with early-stage symptoms of insomnia or insomnia around you. In that case, you need to be careful because insomnia is reported to be affected by genetics to some extent.
If you're already in insomnia, doctors advise not to rely on sleeping pills for long-term use for no reason. 
>> If you're already in insomnia, doctors advise you not to rely on sleeping pills for long-term use for no reason. 
They suggest that it is very important to identify and treat medical conditions contributing to insomnia, such as depression and breathing problems.
>> They will suggest that it is vital to identify and treat medical conditions contributing to insomnia, such as depression and breathing problems.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
130556 When can \"helping\" become a bad thing? ¹Ú*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-08-28 960
130555 What fantasy story or movie do you like? Share the plot of the... Àü*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-28 739
130554 Homework ÀÌ*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-28 1072
130553 Favorite food ·ù*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2023-08-28 5
130552 Answer in full sentences. ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-08-28 542
130551 Have you ever tried TikTok? What do you know about it? Share... ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-28 1
130550 HOMEWORK: Please write a short paragraph about \" The greatest... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-08-28 1
130549 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-08-28 541
130548 Homework ±è* ¿Ï·á 2023-08-28 0
130547 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-08-28 539
130546 What is one thing that you changed your mind about? Why did you... ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-28 877
130545 What are the things you want to improve on in class? ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-28 1
130544 Beth~ ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-08-28 4
130543 today lesson.. ¼­*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2023-08-28 2
130542 Do you believe that we should still help someone even though... ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-28 1096
130541 hat are you grateful for today? È«*±â ¿Ï·á 2023-08-28 670
130540 Homework JA*UNG CHUNG ¿Ï·á 2023-08-28 490
130539 Do you think drivers should be tested frequently to continually... º¹*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-28 0
130538 WRITING TASK: How do you try to overcome your gloomy thoughts? ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-08-28 3
130537 What is the best place for a vacation in your country? Why is it... Á¶*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-08-28 0

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04