¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

In your opinion, what is insomnia? Please give its pros (if it has) and cons.

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*°æ
2023-08-05 2218

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Insomnia is a sleep disorder where people have difficulty falling asleep and staying asleep as long as desired. Insomnia can last a few days or months depending its seriousness. If you are in insomnia, you need to treat it as soon as possible because insomnia is usually followed by daytime sleepiness, low energy and often a drepssed mind. Statistically, old men are more susceptible to insomnia than young men and females are more vulnerable than male. So It takes old men and women more care to prevent insomnia than young people and males respectively.

If you have someone with early stage symptoms of insomnia or in insomnia around you, you need to be careful because insomnia is reported to be affected by genetics to some extent. If you're already in insomnia, doctors advise not to rely on sleeping pills for long-term use for no reason. They suggest that it is very important to identify and treat medical conditions contributing to insomnia, such as depression and breathing problems.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Great job, Steve! Thank you for doing your homework religiously. Continue to practice and if you have some questions, feel free to ask me. Thank you and see you in class! ~ T.Gelly


Insomnia is a sleep disorder where people have difficulty falling asleep and staying asleep as long as desired. 
>> Insomnia is a sleep disorder where people have difficulty falling asleep and staying asleep as long as desired. 
Insomnia can last a few days or months depending its seriousness. 
>> Correct!
OR
>> It can last for a few days or even months depending on how serious it is.
If you are in insomnia, you need to treat it as soon as possible because insomnia is usually followed by daytime sleepiness, low energy and often a drepssed mind. 
>> If you have insomnia, you need to treat it as soon as possible because it is usually followed by daytime drowsiness, weary and often mind depression.
Statistically, old men are more susceptible to insomnia than young men and females are more vulnerable than male. 
>> Statistically, old men are more susceptible to insomnia than young men and females are more vulnerable than males.
So It takes old men and women more care to prevent insomnia than young people and males respectively.
>> So it takes older men and women more attention to prevent insomnia than young people and males.
If you have someone with early stage symptoms of insomnia or in insomnia around you, you need to be careful because insomnia is reported to be affected by genetics to some extent. 
>> Suppose you know someone with early-stage symptoms of insomnia or insomnia around you. In that case, you need to be careful because insomnia is reported to be affected by genetics to some extent.
If you're already in insomnia, doctors advise not to rely on sleeping pills for long-term use for no reason. 
>> If you're already in insomnia, doctors advise you not to rely on sleeping pills for long-term use for no reason. 
They suggest that it is very important to identify and treat medical conditions contributing to insomnia, such as depression and breathing problems.
>> They will suggest that it is vital to identify and treat medical conditions contributing to insomnia, such as depression and breathing problems.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
134077 Save the earth ¹Ú*À² ¿Ï·á 2024-01-22 1641
134076 Who are the people you haven¡¯t seen for a while? ÃÖ*Çý ¿Ï·á 2024-01-22 1
134075 What are the things that are irreplaceable in your life? ÃÖ*Çý ¿Ï·á 2024-01-22 1
134074 Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Parents... ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-01-22 1
134073 Inner beauty ÀÓ*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-01-22 1102
134072 essay 8 ¼Û*½Â ¿Ï·á 2024-01-22 2176
134071 The best vacation with my friends ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-01-22 1658
134070 Answer of conversation question no.3. ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-01-22 1351
134069 What part of Korean tradition are you most proud of? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-01-22 2
134068 >> Is mental health more important than physical health? ÀÌ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-01-21 2
134067 Its raining all day. do*eun ¿Ï·á 2024-01-21 1447
134066 Homework - \"Why is greeting important?\" ¼­*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-01-21 1474
134065 Today\'s homework ÀÌ*µµ ¿Ï·á 2024-01-21 1287
134064 Homework Á¤*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-01-21 1382
134063 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-01-21 533
134062 homework ±è*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-01-20 1282
134061 homework ±è*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-01-20 1054
134060 homework ±è*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-01-20 1011
134059 homework ±è*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-01-20 1505
134058 What annoyances are you more likely to tolerate? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2024-01-20 1508

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04