¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What is the best time to sleep and how many hours we should sleep?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*°æ
2023-08-03 3131

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

In my opinion, it is good to sleep on a regular basis, and not bad to sleep at a late time. What is more important than when to sleep is how much quality sleep you have each day because our body needs enough rest after work every day. It depends from person to person how many hours to sleep. However, I think we need at least over 5 hours a day to recover physically and mentally. But I don't mean to say when to sleep is not important, as the old saying goes, one hour's sleep before midnight is worth three after.

There are many ways and tools to make our sleeping time better, such as ergonomically designed pillows and beds. I strongly recommend you try it. Sound sleep will help you make a wonderful day. If you toss and turn at night and get up on the wrong side of the bed, you can expect that that day could be another bad and tiring day. on that note, investing in good pillows and beds is worthwhile and a must-do in some sense.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Steve! Thank you for doing your homework. It was indeed a nice composition. Kindly check the corrections I made and if you have any questions, feel free to ask them. Have a great day! ~ T.Gelly

In my opinion, it is good to sleep on a regular basis, and not bad to sleep at a late time. 
>> I think it is good to sleep regularly and not bad to sleep late sometimes.
What is more important than when to sleep is how much quality sleep you have each day because our body needs enough rest after work every day. 
>> What is more important is the quality of sleep you get each day because our body needs enough rest after the whole day of work.
It depends from person to person how many hours to sleep. 
>> But this depends from person to person on how many hours of sleep they get.
However, I think we need at least over 5 hours a day to recover physically and mentally. 
>> However, I think we need at least more than 5 hours a day to recover from being exhausted physically and mentally.
But I don't mean to say when to sleep is not important, as the old saying goes, one hour's sleep before midnight is worth three after.
>> But I didn't mean to say that sleeping is not important, as the old saying goes, an hour of sleep before midnight is worth two after.
There are many ways and tools to make our sleeping time better, such as ergonomically designed pillows and beds. 
>> There are many ways and tools to improve our sleeping time, such as ergonomically designed pillows and beds. 
I strongly recommend you try it. 
>> CORRECT
OR 
>> I strongly suggest you try it.
Sound sleep will help you make a wonderful day. 
>>  Having a sound sleep will make your day wonderful.
If you toss and turn at night and get up on the wrong side of the bed, you can expect that that day could be another bad and tiring day. 
>> If you have a restless night and get up on the wrong side of the bed, just expect to have a bad and tiring day.
on that note, investing in good pillows and beds is worthwhile and a must-do in some sense.
>> On a note, investing in good pillows and beds is worthwhile and a must-have in some sense.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
135277 What is the best age to travel? Can children appreciat the... ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-06 1366
135276 Discuss the importance of friendship in your life. ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-03-06 2
135275 medicine ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-06 1
135274 HOMEWORK: Please write a short paragraph about \"Is it healthy... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2024-03-06 1
135273 What do you like buying in the mall? ÃÖ*ÇÑ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-06 1274
135272 My dream house ¹Ú*À² ¿Ï·á 2024-03-06 1493
135271 Do you like at dinosaurs skeletons and bones in museum or... ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-03-06 1118
135270 Bullies ¹Ú*À² ¿Ï·á 2024-03-06 1408
135269 Homework À±*¼± ¿Ï·á 2024-03-06 1834
135268 Homework ¹Ú*Çý ¿Ï·á 2024-03-06 1068
135267 1. Why did you decide to apply for this position? ÃÖ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-03-06 1399
135266 In your opinion, is it better to specialize in a specific area... ¹Ú*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-06 1472
135265 HOMEWORK FOR 03.06.2024 WRITING TASK: How do you stay motivated... ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-03-06 4
135264 When do you prefer having a family gathering? ¿À*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-03-06 1269
135263 What qualities do you value in a friend? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2024-03-06 1902
135262 My boyfriend ÀÓ*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-03-06 1320
135261 Have you asked for a replacement for anything? ±Ç*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-03-06 3
135260 Homework Àå*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-06 2
135259 Who are the people you always check on? ±Ç*ÀÓ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-06 0
135258 What kind of person would be the perfect neighbor? ±Ç*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-03-06 3

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04