¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What is the best time to sleep and how many hours we should sleep?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*°æ
2023-08-03 3891

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

In my opinion, it is good to sleep on a regular basis, and not bad to sleep at a late time. What is more important than when to sleep is how much quality sleep you have each day because our body needs enough rest after work every day. It depends from person to person how many hours to sleep. However, I think we need at least over 5 hours a day to recover physically and mentally. But I don't mean to say when to sleep is not important, as the old saying goes, one hour's sleep before midnight is worth three after.

There are many ways and tools to make our sleeping time better, such as ergonomically designed pillows and beds. I strongly recommend you try it. Sound sleep will help you make a wonderful day. If you toss and turn at night and get up on the wrong side of the bed, you can expect that that day could be another bad and tiring day. on that note, investing in good pillows and beds is worthwhile and a must-do in some sense.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Steve! Thank you for doing your homework. It was indeed a nice composition. Kindly check the corrections I made and if you have any questions, feel free to ask them. Have a great day! ~ T.Gelly

In my opinion, it is good to sleep on a regular basis, and not bad to sleep at a late time. 
>> I think it is good to sleep regularly and not bad to sleep late sometimes.
What is more important than when to sleep is how much quality sleep you have each day because our body needs enough rest after work every day. 
>> What is more important is the quality of sleep you get each day because our body needs enough rest after the whole day of work.
It depends from person to person how many hours to sleep. 
>> But this depends from person to person on how many hours of sleep they get.
However, I think we need at least over 5 hours a day to recover physically and mentally. 
>> However, I think we need at least more than 5 hours a day to recover from being exhausted physically and mentally.
But I don't mean to say when to sleep is not important, as the old saying goes, one hour's sleep before midnight is worth three after.
>> But I didn't mean to say that sleeping is not important, as the old saying goes, an hour of sleep before midnight is worth two after.
There are many ways and tools to make our sleeping time better, such as ergonomically designed pillows and beds. 
>> There are many ways and tools to improve our sleeping time, such as ergonomically designed pillows and beds. 
I strongly recommend you try it. 
>> CORRECT
OR 
>> I strongly suggest you try it.
Sound sleep will help you make a wonderful day. 
>>  Having a sound sleep will make your day wonderful.
If you toss and turn at night and get up on the wrong side of the bed, you can expect that that day could be another bad and tiring day. 
>> If you have a restless night and get up on the wrong side of the bed, just expect to have a bad and tiring day.
on that note, investing in good pillows and beds is worthwhile and a must-do in some sense.
>> On a note, investing in good pillows and beds is worthwhile and a must-have in some sense.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
140844 Homework ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-11-07 1120
140843 6.Nov.2024 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-07 0
140842 What is the most beautiful city you have ever visited? ÀÌ*¹ü ¿Ï·á 2024-11-07 2
140841 What would a perfect day look like for you? ±è*¼ø ¿Ï·á 2024-11-06 1685
140840 What\'s the best company benefit or perk you\'ve received at... ¿À*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-06 1226
140839 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-11-06 4
140838 Home work ½Å*¶ó ¿Ï·á 2024-11-06 1337
140837 homework ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-06 1079
140836 Appearance important Á¤*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-06 7
140835 Should beauty standards include people of all shapes, sizes, and... ½Å*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-11-06 1067
140834 Homework ±è*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-11-06 1037
140833 Introduce myself Á¤*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-06 1165
140832 Cats and dogs are the most common types of pets. What are some... ¿À*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-11-06 1210
140831 Some pieces of art sell for millions of dollars. Why are some... ¿À*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-11-06 1250
140830 What was the hardest part about learning English? ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-06 1
140829 How does kindness show up in small, everyday ways? ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-11-06 1138
140828 What do you want to include in your ideal fitness program? ±è*¸° ¿Ï·á 2024-11-06 1170
140827 My hobby Á¶*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-11-06 921
140826 What part does luck play in success? ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-11-06 1078
140825 Can excessive use of social media have the opposite effect on... ¾È*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-11-06 1122

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04