¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Àå*¼®
2023-08-03 2535

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

HOMEWORK for 08/01
Write 5-8 sentences
TOPIC: What do you think is the best age for people to retire? Why do you think so?

I think best age for people to retier is as soons as posible fast better because when we are young we are good health so we can look at our bodies and we don't have to work hard by our bad bodies. but I think people is don't have to working never.we need just a little work even when we got old

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good morning to you, Min Seog. Thanks for always doing your best in doing your homework. I appreciate all your effort and hard work. Let's continue to study in the class tomorrow. See you! ~ T. Marie ^^ 
I think best age for people to retier is as soons as posible fast better 
>> I think the best age for people to retire is as soon as possible, the faster, the better. 
because when we are young we are good health so we can look at our bodies and we don't have to work hard by our bad bodies. 
>> Because when we were young, we have good health so we can look after our bodies. 
>> We don't have to work hard when our bodies get bad.
but I think people is don't have to working never.
>> But I think people doesn't have to stop working. 
we need just a little work even when we got old
>> We need to work a little even when we get old. 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
131630 homework Á¤*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-13 4
131629 war ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-13 2659
131628 Homework Àå*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-13 1
131627 Tennis ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-10-13 2039
131626 homework_231013 ÇÑ*·Ï ¿Ï·á 2023-10-13 1990
131625 trust ±è*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-13 3
131624 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-12 2520
131623 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-10-12 0
131622 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-10-12 0
131621 What\'s your thought on Korean cuisine? Do you think it\'s... ¿À*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-12 2
131620 homework 10.12 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2023-10-12 1680
131619 Would you trust AI in terms of security? How reliable and... ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-10-12 1
131618 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-12 2
131617 Home work ±è*¶õ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-12 2
131616 Homework ±è*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-12 1677
131615 Homework ±è* ¿Ï·á 2023-10-12 0
131614 What do you think Mark Twain meant when he said, ¡°Never let... ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-10-12 0
131613 Nothing is fixed °­*À² ¿Ï·á 2023-10-12 2
131612 What is your favorite park and why? ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-10-12 2220
131611 HOMEWORK: Please write a short paragraph about ¡°Name a fairy... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-10-12 2

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04