¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Àå*¼®
2023-08-03 2576

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

HOMEWORK for 08/01
Write 5-8 sentences
TOPIC: What do you think is the best age for people to retire? Why do you think so?

I think best age for people to retier is as soons as posible fast better because when we are young we are good health so we can look at our bodies and we don't have to work hard by our bad bodies. but I think people is don't have to working never.we need just a little work even when we got old

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good morning to you, Min Seog. Thanks for always doing your best in doing your homework. I appreciate all your effort and hard work. Let's continue to study in the class tomorrow. See you! ~ T. Marie ^^ 
I think best age for people to retier is as soons as posible fast better 
>> I think the best age for people to retire is as soon as possible, the faster, the better. 
because when we are young we are good health so we can look at our bodies and we don't have to work hard by our bad bodies. 
>> Because when we were young, we have good health so we can look after our bodies. 
>> We don't have to work hard when our bodies get bad.
but I think people is don't have to working never.
>> But I think people doesn't have to stop working. 
we need just a little work even when we got old
>> We need to work a little even when we get old. 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
132108 What are your main responsibilities in your current job? ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-11-02 2608
132107 Are workers more productive at home? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-11-02 1
132106 HOMEWORK -231101 ¾ç*¾Ö ¿Ï·á 2023-11-01 1
132105 Homework ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-11-01 2181
132104 What is your favorite thing to do on social media? Explain why. ±è*¼ø ¿Ï·á 2023-11-01 1822
132103 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-01 2
132102 homework 11.01 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2023-11-01 2325
132101 I am half in favor of and half against the content of the... À±*Çý ¿Ï·á 2023-11-01 1968
132100 I don\'t think I\'m going to ask questions because homeless... À±*Çý ¿Ï·á 2023-11-01 2200
132099 Providing the things you need ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-11-01 2832
132098 I think all movies are the best. À±*Çý ¿Ï·á 2023-11-01 3781
132097 Yes, the world\'s oceans are dangerous. À±*Çý ¿Ï·á 2023-11-01 2434
132096 Pick your favorite food. Describe what you taste, smell, and... ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-01 2770
132095 Which one would you choose, live longer but suffer from more... ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-11-01 1
132094 homework ¾È*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-01 1625
132093 HOMEWORK: Please write a short paragraph about ¡°What is the... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-11-01 3
132092 Have you ever said ¡®no¡¯ when you really wanted to say ¡®yes¡¯? ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-11-01 1
132091 What musical instruments are unique to our country ¹Ú*À² ¿Ï·á 2023-11-01 1862
132090 What are some food combinations that you would like to try? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-11-01 1627
132089 WRITING TASK: What is your dream house? ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-11-01 4

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04