¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

sign of aging

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÃÖ*ȯ
2023-07-19 2443

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I can easily find sign of aging when I get some weight. I can not eat much more than before but I have gotten some weight. I am into running, so even I run 2-3 times a week I have gotten some weight. I have to try harder training for constant my body.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good evening, Thomas! It is wonderful to see you here on the composition page.

I totally agree that at the age of 30's, getting rid of calories is such a difficult thing to achieve. Hence, we have to be very mindful of our food intake as well as the increased number of physical activities we engage in.

Below, I read a very well-written homework answer. Your writing demonstrates very good syntax (arrangement of words) as well as diction (correct choice of words) to create a systematic and logical idea. Please go over some of my grammar suggestions and always keep them in mind. You have done excellent for this homework!

See you again in class tomorrow.

-T. Donna~

I can easily find sign of aging when I get some weight. 
>> Correct!
Or: I can easily find a sign of aging when I (get/ gain) some weight. 

I can not eat much more than before but I have gotten some weight. 
>> Correct!

I am into running, so even I run 2-3 times a week I have gotten some weight. 
>>  I am into running, so even if I run 2-3 times a week I have gotten some weight.  Very good sentence!

I have to try harder training for constant my body.
>> Correct!
Or: I have to try harder training my body constantly.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
126192 homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2023-03-03 1
126191 HOMEWORK FOR TODAY: ESSAY: What is your hobby? Why? ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-03-03 0
126190 If you were a precious stone (example: ruby, diamond, jade),... ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-03 479
126189 unit 4. homework °ø*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-03-03 653
126188 Friday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-03-03 699
126187 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-03-03 1
126186 I\'m not thing changed À±*Çý ¿Ï·á 2023-03-03 616
126185 Some people drink protein shakes or eat any other kind of food... ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-03 698
126184 The difference between a house and a home. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-03-03 657
126183 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-03-03 0
126182 Homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-03-03 695
126181 homework Æí*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-03 1
126180 I like my basketball play. ¿À*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-03 2
126179 If you were a snack, what would you be and why? ¹Ú*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-03-03 774
126178 3/3 homework ÃÖ*º½ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-03 755
126177 bullying ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-03 570
126176 Where do you usually hang out with your friends? ¹Ú*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-03 4
126175 Is it important to consider the source of income (like jobs or... ¹Ú*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-03 2
126174 3/3 °í*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-03-03 1
126173 Homework Àå*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-03 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04