¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¿ì
2023-07-16 2073

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Hi.
It rained too much in Korea these days.
A lot of people died and were injured.
Is your country Ok?
As I said in my previous essay, I bought a console game "Nintendo Switch", and I played it with my three daughters yesterday.
We had a blast.
After my daughters fell asleep, my wife and I played the game "It takes two".
It has a strong story; there are dad, mom, and daughter. these parents didn't get along with each other, so they decided to get divorce and told their kid about it. that kid really wanted her parents to recover their relationship, so she prayed for it. And then some kind of magic happened, and the parents changed into small dolls. Those parents are main actor, and we can control them. we have to complete all missions together. without mutual cooperation, we can't proceed any step.
I think this game is great for married couple.
As for my homework, if I can be a president, I will strenthen all penelties for all criminals.
It can make our world safer and happier for sure.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

I heard about the devastating tragedy in your country, Dr. Kim. I feel sorry for the victims and their families. I hope they can recover and be safe now. Anyway, your game had a story, so it was more interesting.-Faith-
Hi.
>> Hi!
It rained too much in Korea these days.
>> It has rained too much in Korea these days.
A lot of people died and were injured.
>> CORRECT
Is your country Ok?
>> Is your country okay?
As I said in my previous essay, I bought a console game "Nintendo Switch", and I played it with my three daughters yesterday.
>> CORRECT
We had a blast.
>> CORRECT
After my daughters fell asleep, my wife and I played the game "It takes two".
>> After my daughters fell asleep, my wife and I played the game, "It takes two."
It has a strong story; there are dad, mom, and daughter. 
>> It has a strong story; there are a father, a mother, and a daughter. 
these parents didn't get along with each other, so they decided to get divorce and told their kid about it. 
>> The parents didn't get along with each other, so they decided to get a divorce and told their child about it. 
that kid really wanted her parents to recover their relationship, so she prayed for it. 
>> That child really wanted her parents to recover their relationship, so she prayed for it. 
And then some kind of magic happened, and the parents changed into small dolls. 
>> Then some kind of magic happened, and the parents changed into small dolls. 
Those parents are main actor, and we can control them. 
>> Those parents are the main actors, and we can control them. 
we have to complete all missions together. 
>> We have to complete all missions together.
without mutual cooperation, we can't proceed any step.
>> Without mutual cooperation, we can't proceed with any step.
I think this game is great for married couple.
>> CORRECT
As for my homework, if I can be a president, I will strenthen all penelties for all criminals.
>> As for my homework, if I could be the president, I would strengthen all penalties for all criminals.
It can make our world safer and happier for sure.
>> CORRECT
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
129394 What actions are friendly? ¾È*½Ò ¿Ï·á 2023-07-09 1898
129393 Do you think it\'s interesting to live in Incheon? Why? °­*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-09 1624
129392 Home work ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-07-09 1384
129391 What are some ways you strive to make a positive impact on the... ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-07-09 1
129390 What kinds of possible causes for having a vice? ¹®*¿í ¿Ï·á 2023-07-09 3433
129389 What is your favorite part of weddings? ¹Ú*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-09 2119
129388 HOMRWORK ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-07-09 1
129387 What did you enjoy doing as a child? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-07-08 1723
129386 sleepwalking ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-08 0
129385 Homework 7/3 ±è*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-08 1
129384 Home work ±è* ¿Ï·á 2023-07-07 1
129383 Why do some cultures mourn death and others celebrate it? ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-07-07 2
129382 james Á¶* ¿Ï·á 2023-07-07 1510
129381 homework ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2023-07-07 1481
129380 What do you do or eat you feel sleepy when studying? ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-07-07 2284
129379 Korean coffee shops ±è*¸² ¿Ï·á 2023-07-07 1601
129378 Today\'s my homework ÀÌ*µµ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-07 1755
129377 What is my favorite food? ÀÌ*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-07 2866
129376 Do you think historical movies are important to be watched? Why? ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-07-07 1
129375 Should a person get plastic surgery to make themselves have a... ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-07-07 2479

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04