¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Writing task

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¾È*Çü
2023-07-14 1927

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

How to earn money is only by doing part time job. I think they need to overcome their poor life until they are famous.
In order to do that, many famous artists have to encourage and cheer new artists. Their encouragements are only way to make new artists¡¯ ambitions.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Robin.
I know you are tired this week so I really appreciate you spending time doing your homework. You are right! Being an artist is difficult, especially if you are not famous. So if that is really their passion, they have to endure it until they become famous.
-T. Caitlyn
How to earn money is only by doing part time job. 
>> Doing a part-time job is the only way to earn money. 
I think they need to overcome their poor life until they are famous.
>> I think they have to endure poverty until they become famous.
In order to do that, many famous artists have to encourage and cheer new artists. 
>> CORRECT
Their encouragements are only way to make new artists¡¯ ambitions.
>> Their encouragement is the only way to fuel new artists' ambitions.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
129296 sleeping disorder ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-05 2
129295 What did you learn from the fairytale \"Jack and the Beanstalk\"? Á¶*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-05 2076
129294 What word of advice do you have for your son so that he can be... ¹Ú*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-05 1549
129293 Do you have any exercise or fitness goals that you¡¯d like to... ¹Ý* ¿Ï·á 2023-07-05 2293
129292 deny and appeal ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-05 1248
129291 7/5 °í*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-07-05 2
129290 Homework Àå*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-05 1
129289 Homework Á¤*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-05 1578
129288 Can you correct my sentence? ¿À*º½ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-05 2
129287 Trust Á¶*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-05 3166
129286 Does your hobby interfere with your work/study/personal life?... ¾È*½Ò ¿Ï·á 2023-07-04 2308
129285 What\'s your thought on scalpers? ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-07-04 2
129284 What are some effective ways to prevent common illnesses and... ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-07-04 1
129283 Cartoon is good? or bad? ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-07-04 2177
129282 Homework ¿À*ºó ¿Ï·á 2023-07-04 1
129281 What\'s your faverite sport that you watch on TV now a days? Why? ¿À*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-04 1
129280 Describe your overall mood during the summer. What are the good... ¼Û*¶ó ¿Ï·á 2023-07-04 1
129279 homework 07.04 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2023-07-04 1867
129278 What do you want to major in whwn you enter univers ity? why? ¿À*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-04 2
129277 If you were a billionaire, what will you do with your money? °­*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-04 1586

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04