¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Writing task

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¾È*Çü
2023-07-14 2342

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

How to earn money is only by doing part time job. I think they need to overcome their poor life until they are famous.
In order to do that, many famous artists have to encourage and cheer new artists. Their encouragements are only way to make new artists¡¯ ambitions.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Robin.
I know you are tired this week so I really appreciate you spending time doing your homework. You are right! Being an artist is difficult, especially if you are not famous. So if that is really their passion, they have to endure it until they become famous.
-T. Caitlyn
How to earn money is only by doing part time job. 
>> Doing a part-time job is the only way to earn money. 
I think they need to overcome their poor life until they are famous.
>> I think they have to endure poverty until they become famous.
In order to do that, many famous artists have to encourage and cheer new artists. 
>> CORRECT
Their encouragements are only way to make new artists¡¯ ambitions.
>> Their encouragement is the only way to fuel new artists' ambitions.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
134219 WRITING TASK: If you could go to the Vatican, what would be your... ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-01-26 2
134218 Importance of having a hobby ¹Ú*À² ¿Ï·á 2024-01-26 748
134217 homework ±è*¸° ¿Ï·á 2024-01-26 1
134216 People have their own ideas and preferences. In your case, what... ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2024-01-26 1145
134215 homework 2024-01-26 ÀÌ*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2024-01-26 2
134214 Homework for 1/25 do*eun ¿Ï·á 2024-01-26 1230
134213 Happy FTI ! do*eun ¿Ï·á 2024-01-26 1397
134212 Who are the people you haven¡¯t seen for a while? ±Ç*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-01-26 4
134211 Learning about the past has no value for those of us living in... ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-01-26 0
134210 What countries would you like to vistit someday? ÃÖ*¼ø ¿Ï·á 2024-01-26 1198
134209 3 DAY Homework ÀÌ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-01-25 1517
134208 Career opportunities in urban areas ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-01-25 1918
134207 Pick one food Ȳ*Çý ¿Ï·á 2024-01-25 1294
134206 homework 01.25 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2024-01-25 1378
134205 Homework ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-01-25 1187
134204 Homework À±*¼± ¿Ï·á 2024-01-25 1397
134203 What are the advantages and disadvantages of a four-day week? ¼­*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-01-25 2298
134202 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-01-25 1
134201 The disparities in the university system °­*À² ¿Ï·á 2024-01-25 1
134200 What do you think is the most challenging thing about... ±è*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-01-25 2

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04