¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Does your hobby interfere with your work/study/personal life? Please explain your answer.

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¾È*½Ò
2023-07-04 2722

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Yes, it does. My hobby influences my work and personal life. For example, I am a music band member at my church, playing the electronic keyboard and organizing coffee chats for harmony among my band members. This experience made me understand what teamwork is. We all members are different regarding artistic temperature and characteristics. In order to make harmony in the band, I first try to talk about our shared vision related to our music, and then I listen to other members' stories and thoughts to find out their strengths and weaknesses. These processes helped my team make one team by knowing each other deeply. Thus, at my work, I am also in charge of a bridge between team members or team members and our boss. I am used to doing that role because of my experiences participating in the music band. Meanwhile, these experiences allowed me to accept diverse people in my life, making a friend more easily and comfortably. Thus, I think my hobby interferes with several parts of my life.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Thank you for your effort to answer the question genuinely, Shine. May you continue to develop productive hobbies.
-Faith-
Yes, it does. 
>> CORRECT
My hobby influences my work and personal life. 
>> CORRECT
For example, I am a music band member at my church, playing the electronic keyboard and organizing coffee chats for harmony among my band members. 
>> For example, I am a music band member at my church, so I play the electronic keyboard and organize coffee chats for harmony among my band members. 
This experience made me understand what teamwork is. 
>> CORRECT
We all members are different regarding artistic temperature and characteristics. 
>> We, all members, are different regarding artistic temperaments and characteristics. 
In order to make harmony in the band, I first try to talk about our shared vision related to our music, and then I listen to other members' stories and thoughts to find out their strengths and weaknesses. 
>> CORRECT
These processes helped my team make one team by knowing each other deeply. 
>> These processes helped us make one team by knowing each other deeply. 
Thus, at my work, I am also in charge of a bridge between team members or team members and our boss. 
>> Thus, at my work, I am also in charge and play as a bridge among the team members or between the team members and our boss. 
I am used to doing that role because of my experiences participating in the music band. 
>> CORRECT
Meanwhile, these experiences allowed me to accept diverse people in my life, making a friend more easily and comfortably. 
>> CORRECT
Thus, I think my hobby interferes with several parts of my life.
>> CORRECT
OR Hence, my hobby intervenes with my life immensely.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
133068 How do you define commitment, and why is it important in various... ¾ö*ºó ¿Ï·á 2023-12-08 1
133067 homework ¹Ú*Çý ¿Ï·á 2023-12-08 1422
133066 Homework ¿À*ºó ¿Ï·á 2023-12-08 0
133065 Refusing to do something ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-12-07 1245
133064 homework 12.07 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2023-12-07 1598
133063 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-07 3
133062 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-12-07 1277
133061 Homework ±è*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-07 1614
133060 Homework 6 ±Ç*Å ¿Ï·á 2023-12-07 2168
133059 Have you ever fought or had misunderstanding with a co-worker? ÀÌ*¼Ö ¿Ï·á 2023-12-07 1958
133058 HOMEWORK: Please write a short paragraph about \"What do you... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-12-07 2
133057 Tell me about the most fashionable people you know. ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-12-07 2
133056 Why is learning English important? ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-12-07 6
133055 HOMEWORK FOR 12.07.2023 WRITING TASK: What are the pros and cons... ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-12-07 6
133054 HOMEWORK FOR 12.06.2023 WRITING TASK: Do you believe that there... ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-12-07 11
133053 Why are fewer and fewer people getting married? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-12-07 1559
133052 commitment to something ÀÓ*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-12-07 1761
133051 Type of drink depending on place. ±è*ºó ¿Ï·á 2023-12-07 0
133050 homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2023-12-07 1
133049 homework Á¤*¾È ¿Ï·á 2023-12-07 0

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04