¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Do you think mental health is more important than physical health? Why so?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¹Ý*
2023-07-03 2583

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I think mental health is more important than physical health.

Doctors say stress is the source of all disease.

Even healthy people get sick when their minds get sick.

On the contrary, even those who are not healthy in their bodies recover quickly when their mind become healthy.

There are some good hormones to release stress and enhance mental health.

First, endorphin. That comes out when you smile. It has a pain-killing effect, boost immunity, and increase cancer-killing cells.

Second is serotonin, which comes out when you¡¯re comfortable. It comes out when you have good news, good music, and gratitude.
And it relieves your mental tension and stabilizes your blood pressure.

The third is melatonin. It is secreted when you sleep enough, and it plays an important role in immunity, anti-aging, and anti-inflammatory.

Let¡¯s smile a lot, see or listen good things a lot, touched a lot, and get enough sleep so that we can take care of our mental health.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Thank you for this Philip. In this modern competitive society we live in, stress is more common and intensified. Finding a good way to release stress and sleeping well enough are indeed necessary.

I think mental health is more important than physical health.
>>>   correct
Doctors say stress is the source of all disease.
>>>   correct
Even healthy people get sick when their minds get sick.
>>>   correct
On the contrary, even those who are not healthy in their bodies recover quickly when their mind become healthy.
>>>  correct 
>>> OR: On the contrary, even those who are not healthy physically recover quickly when their mind is healthy.
There are some good hormones to release stress and enhance mental health.
>>> There are some good hormones to relieve stress and enhance mental health. 
First, endorphin. 
>>>  correct 
That comes out when you smile. 
>>>  correct 
It has a pain-killing effect, boost immunity, and increases cancer-killing cells.
>>>  correct  
Second is serotonin, which comes out when you¡¯re comfortable. 
>>>  correct  
It comes out when you have good news, good music, and gratitude.
>>>  correct  
And it relieves your mental tension and stabilizes your blood pressure.

>>>  correct  
The third is melatonin. 
>>>  correct  
It is secreted when you sleep enough, and it plays an important role in immunity, anti-aging, and anti-inflammatory.
>>>  correct  
Let¡¯s smile a lot, see or listen good things a lot, touched a lot, and get enough sleep so that we can take care of our mental health.
>>>   Let¡¯s smile a lot, see or listen to good things a lot, be touched a lot, and get enough sleep so that we can take care of our mental health.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
131351 How do you stay organized and manage your time effectively when... Á¤*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-01 1104
131350 How I feel when I am not prepared for something ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-09-30 1671
131349 How would the world be a better place if we used only clean... À¯* ¿Ï·á 2023-09-28 0
131348 Are you happy to be living in the ¡®Information Age¡¯? À¯* ¿Ï·á 2023-09-28 0
131347 Which country produces the best cars? À¯* ¿Ï·á 2023-09-28 0
131346 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-28 2
131345 Is there a particular song that always puts you in a good mood?... ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-09-28 1627
131344 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-27 1380
131343 homework 09.27 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2023-09-27 1264
131342 If you were to remove one traditional holiday (could be Korean... ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-09-27 1
131341 What is something that you are thankful for?ᩚ ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-09-27 1106
131340 homework ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-27 1468
131339 Would you rather play video games or read books all day? ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-09-27 1727
131338 homework ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-27 1429
131337 HOMEWORK: Please write a short paragraph about ¡°The most... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-09-27 0
131336 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-09-27 1484
131335 The most difficult part of studying English ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-09-27 1419
131334 WRITING TASK: What kind of help do you need from your new... ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-09-27 4
131333 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-27 1676
131332 If you had a company, will you hire a professional or an amateur... ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-27 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04