¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Do you think mental health is more important than physical health? Why so?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¹Ý*
2023-07-03 2768

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I think mental health is more important than physical health.

Doctors say stress is the source of all disease.

Even healthy people get sick when their minds get sick.

On the contrary, even those who are not healthy in their bodies recover quickly when their mind become healthy.

There are some good hormones to release stress and enhance mental health.

First, endorphin. That comes out when you smile. It has a pain-killing effect, boost immunity, and increase cancer-killing cells.

Second is serotonin, which comes out when you¡¯re comfortable. It comes out when you have good news, good music, and gratitude.
And it relieves your mental tension and stabilizes your blood pressure.

The third is melatonin. It is secreted when you sleep enough, and it plays an important role in immunity, anti-aging, and anti-inflammatory.

Let¡¯s smile a lot, see or listen good things a lot, touched a lot, and get enough sleep so that we can take care of our mental health.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Thank you for this Philip. In this modern competitive society we live in, stress is more common and intensified. Finding a good way to release stress and sleeping well enough are indeed necessary.

I think mental health is more important than physical health.
>>>   correct
Doctors say stress is the source of all disease.
>>>   correct
Even healthy people get sick when their minds get sick.
>>>   correct
On the contrary, even those who are not healthy in their bodies recover quickly when their mind become healthy.
>>>  correct 
>>> OR: On the contrary, even those who are not healthy physically recover quickly when their mind is healthy.
There are some good hormones to release stress and enhance mental health.
>>> There are some good hormones to relieve stress and enhance mental health. 
First, endorphin. 
>>>  correct 
That comes out when you smile. 
>>>  correct 
It has a pain-killing effect, boost immunity, and increases cancer-killing cells.
>>>  correct  
Second is serotonin, which comes out when you¡¯re comfortable. 
>>>  correct  
It comes out when you have good news, good music, and gratitude.
>>>  correct  
And it relieves your mental tension and stabilizes your blood pressure.

>>>  correct  
The third is melatonin. 
>>>  correct  
It is secreted when you sleep enough, and it plays an important role in immunity, anti-aging, and anti-inflammatory.
>>>  correct  
Let¡¯s smile a lot, see or listen good things a lot, touched a lot, and get enough sleep so that we can take care of our mental health.
>>>   Let¡¯s smile a lot, see or listen to good things a lot, be touched a lot, and get enough sleep so that we can take care of our mental health.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
133422 HOMEWORK: Please write a short paragraph about \"What role would... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-12-23 1
133421 How much time do you spend in the morning doing your hair? Do... ±è*¼ø ¿Ï·á 2023-12-22 1212
133420 One of the most useful products of technology Àå*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2023-12-22 4
133419 What are some travel tips to make sure that you will enjoy your... ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-12-22 1748
133418 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-22 3
133417 Physical activity ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-12-22 1182
133416 What¡¯s one gift you¡¯re secretly hoping to receive this year? ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-12-22 2
133415 homework ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2023-12-22 1446
133414 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-22 1
133413 Do you believe in any superstitions, even if you know they might... ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-12-22 1282
133412 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-12-22 951
133411 I want to be free~! ¼­*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-12-22 1073
133410 Here are some statements that you can say to yourself. ±Ç*¸ð ¿Ï·á 2023-12-22 1362
133409 Homework : unit 14 ¹Ú*³ª ¿Ï·á 2023-12-22 2
133408 Research local food ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-22 1491
133407 HOMEWORK FOR 12.20.2023 WRITING TASK: What do you want for a... ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-12-22 3
133406 HOMEWORK FOR 12.21.2023 WRITING TASK: What is your favorite... ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-12-22 3
133405 Reasons of a dual income couple °­*À² ¿Ï·á 2023-12-22 1
133404 Homework ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-12-22 1014
133403 Memory in Christmas ÀÌ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-12-22 1444

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04