¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework 06.29

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÃÖ*Ç
2023-06-29 1331

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
What do you think are the most dangerous jobs?

There are many dangerous jobs in the world.
Construction workers, firefighters, police, miners, fishermen, etc.
Among them, I think dangerous job is ocean fishing vessel(¿ø¾ç ¾î¼±).
They're fishermen, but it is some special.
Once they are out in the ocean, during a few weeks at least or months at most they are catch the fish.
But, everything in the sea is dangerous.
If break down they're ship, they are should fixed own.
Can be hurt by equipment(net, fishing needle).
If they're sick, They can't go to the hospital.
And work difficulty is extreme hard.
So, wages are very high.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good day, Keon!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille


~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
What do you think are the most dangerous jobs?


There are many dangerous jobs in the world.
>> CORRECT!
Construction workers, firefighters, police, miners, fishermen, etc.
>> There are construction workers, firefighters, police, miners, fishermen, and many more.
Among them, I think dangerous job is ocean fishing vessel(¿ø¾ç ¾î¼±).
>> Among them, I think the most dangerous job is ocean fishing vessel(¿ø¾ç ¾î¼±).
They're fishermen, but it is some special.
>> They're fishermen, but it is a bit more special.
Once they are out in the ocean, during a few weeks at least or months at most they are catch the fish.
>> Once they are out in the ocean, during a few weeks at least, or months at most, they catch fish.
But, everything in the sea is dangerous.
>> CORRECT!
If break down they're ship, they are should fixed own.
>> If their ship breaks down, they should fix it on their own.
Can be hurt by equipment(net, fishing needle).
>> It can be because of their equipment (net, fishing needle).
If they're sick, They can't go to the hospital.
>> If they're sick, they can't go to the hospital.
And work difficulty is extreme hard.
>>  And the nature of their work is extremely hard.
So, wages are very high.
>> CORRECT!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
129468 Myhomework Àü*¼± ¿Ï·á 2023-07-12 1013
129467 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-07-12 1615
129466 Homework ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-12 3
129465 Homework 7/12 ±è*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-12 1
129464 WRITING TASK: What other languages would you like to learn? Why? ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-07-12 2
129463 Homework 7/10 ±è*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-12 1
129462 Homework 7/7 ±è*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-12 1
129461 My homeworks 7/5 ±è*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-12 1
129460 drunk driver ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-12 1316
129459 11.July.2023 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-12 6
129458 What do you like about visiting other country? °­*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-12 1174
129457 In your opinion, is it important for everyone to learn English?... °­*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-12 1081
129456 Group projects! ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-07-12 654
129455 Do you think the expression \'Appearances are deceptive\' is... Á¶*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-07-12 1463
129454 Day1 ½Å*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-07-11 2
129453 Myhomework Àü*¼± ¿Ï·á 2023-07-11 1588
129452 homework Àå*¼® ¿Ï·á 2023-07-11 1182
129451 7-11 homework. ±è*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-11 1
129450 How do you get people to listen to your presentation attentively? ±¸*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-07-11 0
129449 What\'s your thought on a government that is pro-company? ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-07-11 2

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04