¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¿ì
2023-06-27 1502

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Hello, T.Donna.
It was a hectic day.
In fact, there were only few patients/clients at the clinic.
However, there were many things that I should concern about.
First, many staff made many mistakes.
Second, a new bothersome administrative work happened.
Third, the scanner of compound machine was broken.
And, I selected a drying machine for my mother, because I promised her that I will buy one.
Of course, the profit for today was not good.
These situation made me upset.
However, there was also good things.
After the work, I attended the conference, which was held in a good hotel near my house.
I met my friend there, and we enjoyed dinner that was served.
That dinner was amazing; composed of steak, grilled prawn, cabier, and cake.
Because my friend has a membership of that hotel, we could enjoy Sauna.
Sauna really relaxed me so much.
The last, my friend showed me his new car; Porche 911 carrera GTS.
His car looked so great, so that I applauded for it.
Tomorrow is my day off.
See you.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi there, Dr. Kim!

As Dr. MJ goes for a day off, expect that your tasks may be doubled. Nonetheless, your staff is right there to support you. However, if you still have to tell them in detail what they need to do accurately, that can be so tough. Then, constant reminders are a must.

Sometimes, when it rains, it pours. One problem arises after another. When the staff are not doing well, the scanner breaks, and so on. Luckily, at the end of the day, you have very good friends who can ease your weariness through a hearty meal, sauna, and a brand new car!

Therefore, I can see that your life is still in perfect balance. You are truly fortunate no matter what happens.

So, read my grammar suggestions on prepositions, verb tenses, the use of 'a' and 'the', among others. Overall, your composition displays complexity and clarity as well as breath and depth of ideas. Excellent job!

See you later!

-T. Donna~

Hello, T.Donna.
>> Correct!

It was a hectic day.
>> Correct!

In fact, there were only few patients/clients at the clinic.
>> Correct!
Or: In fact, there were only few patients/clients in the clinic.

However, there were many things that I should concern about.
>> However, there were many things that I should be concerned about.

First, many staff made many mistakes.
>> Correct!

Second, a new bothersome administrative work happened.
>> Correct!

Third, the scanner of compound machine was broken.
>> Third, the scanner of the compound machine was broken.

And, I selected a drying machine for my mother, because I promised her that I will buy one.
>> Correct!

Of course, the profit for today was not good.
>> Correct!

These situation made me upset.
>> These situations made me upset.

However, there was also good things.
>> However, there were also good things.

After the work, I attended the conference, which was held in a good hotel near my house.
>> Correct!
Or:  After the work, I attended a conference which was held in a good hotel near my house.

I met my friend there, and we enjoyed dinner that was served.
>> Correct!

That dinner was amazing; composed of steak, grilled prawn, cabier, and cake.
>> Correct!
Or: That dinner was amazing and it was composed of steak, grilled prawn, caviar, and cake.

Because my friend has a membership of that hotel, we could enjoy Sauna.
>> Correct!

Sauna really relaxed me so much.
>> Correct!

The last, my friend showed me his new car; Porche 911 carrera GTS.
>> Correct!

His car looked so great, so that I applauded for it.
>> His car looked so great, so that I applauded it.

Tomorrow is my day off.
>> Correct!

See you.
>> Correct!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
127140 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-03 1
127139 When looking for a pre-school, what do you always consider... ·ù*¼± ¿Ï·á 2023-04-03 3
127138 A difficult answer ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-03 1
127137 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-03 1
127136 Homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-04-03 2
127135 What is your priority at the moment and what do you want to... ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-04-03 3
127134 We can\'t be always practical. ÀÌ*¿õ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-03 3
127133 homework ä*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-03 627
127132 homework ä*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-03 615
127131 homework ä*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-03 705
127130 If you could stop time, what would you do and why? ·ù*¼± ¿Ï·á 2023-04-03 2
127129 homework ä*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-03 562
127128 Hw ÃÖ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-03 1
127127 The nicest compliment I\'ve ever received ±Ç*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-04-03 2
127126 Homework 2 ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-03 605
127125 Give at least two better alternatives to gadgets when taking... ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-04-03 4
127124 Which TV programs do you want to watch? Why? ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-04-03 2
127123 Homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2023-04-03 0
127122 What do you think of working abroad? Is it a good idea to work... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-03 491
127121 I think I have done everything. À±*Çý ¿Ï·á 2023-04-03 586

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04