¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¿ì
2023-06-27 1432

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Hello, T.Donna.
It was a hectic day.
In fact, there were only few patients/clients at the clinic.
However, there were many things that I should concern about.
First, many staff made many mistakes.
Second, a new bothersome administrative work happened.
Third, the scanner of compound machine was broken.
And, I selected a drying machine for my mother, because I promised her that I will buy one.
Of course, the profit for today was not good.
These situation made me upset.
However, there was also good things.
After the work, I attended the conference, which was held in a good hotel near my house.
I met my friend there, and we enjoyed dinner that was served.
That dinner was amazing; composed of steak, grilled prawn, cabier, and cake.
Because my friend has a membership of that hotel, we could enjoy Sauna.
Sauna really relaxed me so much.
The last, my friend showed me his new car; Porche 911 carrera GTS.
His car looked so great, so that I applauded for it.
Tomorrow is my day off.
See you.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi there, Dr. Kim!

As Dr. MJ goes for a day off, expect that your tasks may be doubled. Nonetheless, your staff is right there to support you. However, if you still have to tell them in detail what they need to do accurately, that can be so tough. Then, constant reminders are a must.

Sometimes, when it rains, it pours. One problem arises after another. When the staff are not doing well, the scanner breaks, and so on. Luckily, at the end of the day, you have very good friends who can ease your weariness through a hearty meal, sauna, and a brand new car!

Therefore, I can see that your life is still in perfect balance. You are truly fortunate no matter what happens.

So, read my grammar suggestions on prepositions, verb tenses, the use of 'a' and 'the', among others. Overall, your composition displays complexity and clarity as well as breath and depth of ideas. Excellent job!

See you later!

-T. Donna~

Hello, T.Donna.
>> Correct!

It was a hectic day.
>> Correct!

In fact, there were only few patients/clients at the clinic.
>> Correct!
Or: In fact, there were only few patients/clients in the clinic.

However, there were many things that I should concern about.
>> However, there were many things that I should be concerned about.

First, many staff made many mistakes.
>> Correct!

Second, a new bothersome administrative work happened.
>> Correct!

Third, the scanner of compound machine was broken.
>> Third, the scanner of the compound machine was broken.

And, I selected a drying machine for my mother, because I promised her that I will buy one.
>> Correct!

Of course, the profit for today was not good.
>> Correct!

These situation made me upset.
>> These situations made me upset.

However, there was also good things.
>> However, there were also good things.

After the work, I attended the conference, which was held in a good hotel near my house.
>> Correct!
Or:  After the work, I attended a conference which was held in a good hotel near my house.

I met my friend there, and we enjoyed dinner that was served.
>> Correct!

That dinner was amazing; composed of steak, grilled prawn, cabier, and cake.
>> Correct!
Or: That dinner was amazing and it was composed of steak, grilled prawn, caviar, and cake.

Because my friend has a membership of that hotel, we could enjoy Sauna.
>> Correct!

Sauna really relaxed me so much.
>> Correct!

The last, my friend showed me his new car; Porche 911 carrera GTS.
>> Correct!

His car looked so great, so that I applauded for it.
>> His car looked so great, so that I applauded it.

Tomorrow is my day off.
>> Correct!

See you.
>> Correct!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
131192 Do you wish you could exercise more? ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-09-20 1
131191 How do you think current wars could be stopped? ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-09-20 2
131190 Homework Àå*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-20 1
131189 What are some of the most polluted cities in the world? ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-09-20 1
131188 Which family holiday is you favorite? ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-09-20 1183
131187 Call ÀÌ*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-20 1053
131186 homework ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-20 1400
131185 Which school subject is least favorite why? ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-09-20 1967
131184 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-20 2
131183 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-09-20 1596
131182 HOMEWORK: Please write a short paragraph about \" What makes... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-09-20 1
131181 A stressful job with very high pay or a relaxing job with... ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-09-20 1185
131180 How do you protect your privacy at home as a young adult? ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-20 1
131179 HOMEWORK-230920 ¾ç*¾Ö ¿Ï·á 2023-09-20 1
131178 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-09-20 1444
131177 WRITING TASK: Why is work etiquette important? ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-09-20 1612
131176 Homework JA*UNG CHUNG ¿Ï·á 2023-09-20 1205
131175 The most dangerous country ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-20 1480
131174 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-20 1141
131173 What qualities do you look for in a good movie? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-20 1474

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04