¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¿ì
2023-06-27 1587

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Hello, T.Donna.
It was a hectic day.
In fact, there were only few patients/clients at the clinic.
However, there were many things that I should concern about.
First, many staff made many mistakes.
Second, a new bothersome administrative work happened.
Third, the scanner of compound machine was broken.
And, I selected a drying machine for my mother, because I promised her that I will buy one.
Of course, the profit for today was not good.
These situation made me upset.
However, there was also good things.
After the work, I attended the conference, which was held in a good hotel near my house.
I met my friend there, and we enjoyed dinner that was served.
That dinner was amazing; composed of steak, grilled prawn, cabier, and cake.
Because my friend has a membership of that hotel, we could enjoy Sauna.
Sauna really relaxed me so much.
The last, my friend showed me his new car; Porche 911 carrera GTS.
His car looked so great, so that I applauded for it.
Tomorrow is my day off.
See you.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi there, Dr. Kim!

As Dr. MJ goes for a day off, expect that your tasks may be doubled. Nonetheless, your staff is right there to support you. However, if you still have to tell them in detail what they need to do accurately, that can be so tough. Then, constant reminders are a must.

Sometimes, when it rains, it pours. One problem arises after another. When the staff are not doing well, the scanner breaks, and so on. Luckily, at the end of the day, you have very good friends who can ease your weariness through a hearty meal, sauna, and a brand new car!

Therefore, I can see that your life is still in perfect balance. You are truly fortunate no matter what happens.

So, read my grammar suggestions on prepositions, verb tenses, the use of 'a' and 'the', among others. Overall, your composition displays complexity and clarity as well as breath and depth of ideas. Excellent job!

See you later!

-T. Donna~

Hello, T.Donna.
>> Correct!

It was a hectic day.
>> Correct!

In fact, there were only few patients/clients at the clinic.
>> Correct!
Or: In fact, there were only few patients/clients in the clinic.

However, there were many things that I should concern about.
>> However, there were many things that I should be concerned about.

First, many staff made many mistakes.
>> Correct!

Second, a new bothersome administrative work happened.
>> Correct!

Third, the scanner of compound machine was broken.
>> Third, the scanner of the compound machine was broken.

And, I selected a drying machine for my mother, because I promised her that I will buy one.
>> Correct!

Of course, the profit for today was not good.
>> Correct!

These situation made me upset.
>> These situations made me upset.

However, there was also good things.
>> However, there were also good things.

After the work, I attended the conference, which was held in a good hotel near my house.
>> Correct!
Or:  After the work, I attended a conference which was held in a good hotel near my house.

I met my friend there, and we enjoyed dinner that was served.
>> Correct!

That dinner was amazing; composed of steak, grilled prawn, cabier, and cake.
>> Correct!
Or: That dinner was amazing and it was composed of steak, grilled prawn, caviar, and cake.

Because my friend has a membership of that hotel, we could enjoy Sauna.
>> Correct!

Sauna really relaxed me so much.
>> Correct!

The last, my friend showed me his new car; Porche 911 carrera GTS.
>> Correct!

His car looked so great, so that I applauded for it.
>> His car looked so great, so that I applauded it.

Tomorrow is my day off.
>> Correct!

See you.
>> Correct!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
132526 homework ±è*¸° ¿Ï·á 2023-11-17 0
132525 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-11-17 2413
132524 What do you know about Australia\'s natural wonders? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-11-17 2706
132523 Why is it that some people act differently in front of others? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-11-17 2010
132522 What are the dangers of using SNS? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-11-17 1764
132521 What do you think parents worry about when their kids start... ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-11-17 1357
132520 Homework ±è* ¿Ï·á 2023-11-17 3
132519 homework Á¤*¾È ¿Ï·á 2023-11-17 0
132518 Why do you think there are so many different languages in the... À±*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2023-11-17 3
132517 test Te*002 ¿Ï·á 2023-11-17 3
132516 homework ¾È*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-17 2091
132515 In your opinion, what are the other problems in your country... ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-17 2725
132514 Do you think Korea has good or bad politics? How can you say so? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-17 2101
132513 Are there any activities that you want to do with your kids... ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-17 2678
132512 Do you want to spend your leisure time alone or with friends?... ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-17 1401
132511 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-11-17 2246
132510 I live in Seongnam ±è*ºó ¿Ï·á 2023-11-17 2
132509 My braveness and persistence ÀÓ*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-11-17 2460
132508 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-17 1419
132507 Do you think veganism is just a current trend that will... ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-11-17 2

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04