¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What is your opinion about the rising number of young people taking time off without seeking jobs or

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¹®*Çö
2023-06-27 1473

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Considering Korea, I believe it is reasonable. Relative to other nations, Korea has a low unemployment rate of 4%. However, the social awareness of both employment and study is high. This advancement can be positive considering employment status and university entrance rate. However, this is also letting many young generations down. Unlike other countries, Korean regard good employment as entering big conglomerates and foreign-based companies. Social status, pay rate, and benefits are clearly divided between big-sized firms and mid to small-sized companies. Such awareness led many young individuals to put their efforts to enter those companies even though this can indicate unemployed for several years. Overcoming such misconceptions is challenging because this can go back to generation. In my case, my parents were proud of me for starting my career at Dow Jones because it is well-known company. Jobs are no longer the method of sustain owns life in Korea but something to brag about.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Thank you for this Aciel. I do understand this phenomenon though. I mean, most Koreans put effort, money and time in high quality education. As a result, they also want to get back all those factors they have compromised or sacrificed. This means, getting a good paying job with good working condition.

Considering Korea, I believe it is reasonable. 
>>> correct
Relative to other nations, Korea has a low unemployment rate of 4%. 
>>> correct
>>> OR: Relative to other nations, Korea has a low unemployment rate at 4%. 
However, the social awareness of both employment and study is high. 
>>> However, the social awareness of both employment and studying is high. 
>>> OR: However, the social awareness of both employment and education is high. 
This advancement can be positive considering employment status and university entrance rate. 
>>>  correct
However, this is also letting many young generations down. 
>>> correct
Unlike other countries, Korean regard good employment as entering big conglomerates and foreign-based companies. 
>>>  correct
Social status, pay rate, and benefits are clearly divided between big-sized firms and mid to small-sized companies. 
>>>  correct
Such awareness led many young individuals to put their efforts to enter those companies even though this can indicate unemployed for several years. 
>>>  correct
Overcoming such misconceptions is challenging because this can go back to generation. 
>>>   correct
In my case, my parents were proud of me for starting my career at Dow Jones because it is well-known company. 
>>> In my case, my parents were proud of me for starting my career at Dow Jones because it is a well-known company. 
Jobs are no longer the method of sustain owns life in Korea but something to brag about.
>>> Jobs are no longer the method of sustaining one's own life in Korea but something to brag about.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
129075 writing exercise ¼­*ÅÃ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-26 1659
129074 How does organization and decluttering contribute to a peaceful... ¼Û*¶ó ¿Ï·á 2023-06-26 1
129073 season food ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-26 1
129072 Homework ¼Û*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-26 2550
129071 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-26 1755
129070   If you could have it your way, how would you like to... ¹Ý* ¿Ï·á 2023-06-26 1636
129069 Writing task ¾È*Çü ¿Ï·á 2023-06-26 1248
129068 What kind of second job do you want to have? ¹Ú*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-26 2391
129067 Homework ÀÌ*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-06-26 1575
129066 Homework ÀÌ*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-06-26 1261
129065 Homework È«*¼± ¿Ï·á 2023-06-26 1
129064 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-26 1285
129063 How can you say that a country has a good leader? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-06-26 0
129062 Do you leave confidential information in a voice mail? ±¸*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-06-25 1
129061 Should the fashion industry use models that look more like... ±¸*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-06-25 1112
129060 Who is the person you admire the most? Why? ±¸*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-06-25 2245
129059 Should cell phones be allowed at school? Why or why not? ±¸*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-06-25 1369
129058 Night¡¯s sleep Á¶*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-25 2209
129057 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-06-25 1780
129056 HOMEWORK1 ÀÌ*½Â ¿Ï·á 2023-06-25 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04