¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

If you meet some South Koreans there in your place, what kind of information will you ask them?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¹Ú*°æ
2023-06-23 978

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Well, first of all, I'd like to ask some useful shopping centers such as clothes and shoes, grocery not just big shopping malls like COSTCO and Walmart. Because, those are quite busy and there are too many products packed which are too heavy.
Besides, I wonder if there are Korean communities. I want to meet people to make a friend.
Lastly, I want to choose a good presbyterian church so that I can relax and recharge my batteries through worship and relationship with the people.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi there, Jane!

Wow, you never forgot to write and your sentences are even longer and better! I am so happy to read from you here on the composition site once again!

Trying to find new friends can take place in some of your favorite places, like a coffee shop or a restaurant. Also, you can be in the loop of the local events such as market day on weekends. Attend them and introduce yourself. You can also try using an application on your phone. Seek out people with similar interests and don¡¯t be afraid to make the first move.

As you can see, some grammar suggestions contain efficient ways of using conjunctions as well as correct capitalization. Thank you for sending this excellent answer! I shall rea from you again next time.

Happy weekend!

-T. Donna~

Well, first of all, I'd like to ask some useful shopping centers such as clothes and shoes, grocery not just big shopping malls like COSTCO and Walmart. 
>> Correct!
Or: Well, first of all, I'd like to ask some useful shopping centers such as clothes, shoes, and groceries not just big shopping malls like COSTCO and Walmart. 

Because, those are quite busy and there are too many products packed which are too heavy.
>> Correct!

Besides, I wonder if there are Korean communities. 
>> Correct!

I want to meet people to make a friend.
>> Correct!

Lastly, I want to choose a good presbyterian church so that I can relax and recharge my batteries through worship and relationship with the people.
>> Correct!
Or: Presbyterian
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
128412 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-05-23 1
128411 Write about your favorite part of the movie The Super Mario... ¿À*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2023-05-23 1
128410 Why do people love junk food? ±¸*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-05-23 925
128409 talk about the meal you last ate or had. Use as many adjectives... ¹é*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-05-23 1051
128408 Mary Kay Ash said: \"People are definitely a company¡¯s greatest... ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-05-23 5
128407 Describe the most confident person you know ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-05-23 1028
128406 The gift that I want to receive on my birthday ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-05-23 1055
128405 What is your favorite cartoon character and why? ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-05-23 750
128404 Homework ±è*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2023-05-23 1026
128403 What do you do to loosen up after a busy exhausting day? ±è*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2023-05-23 1005
128402 What are some ways to enjoy the summer vacation? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-05-23 799
128401 Have you been to a dinosaur museum? How was it? ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-05-23 0
128400 Tuesday Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-05-23 1129
128399 Do you think that governments should encourage public transport... ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2023-05-23 720
128398 When do you prefer having a family gathering? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2023-05-23 1223
128397 What have you lost while traveling? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2023-05-23 921
128396 Homework Àå*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-05-23 0
128395 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-05-23 1101
128394 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-05-23 1074
128393 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-05-23 0

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04