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영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

My ideal life

작성자: 김*림
2023-06-21 1055

회원님의 영작문

When I think of my ideal life, I can think of where I live on the top of my head. My father has always said that getting my own home is most important thing. So, when I grow up and earn enough money to buy house, I want to live where I can swim once a day and have barbecue party with my friends. Also, the house has to be filled with board games that I can play with.
Now I don’t have my dream job or what I want to become, but I want to earn money what I really like to do and eager to. Earning money by doing what I like will be one of my ideal life.
Also, I want to fall in love with who really likes me and the people who can give good energy to each other. If I have a boyfriend, I want to travel lots of countries I haven’t been and also Spain that I really want to visit.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용




Hi, Emily! Thank you so much for your time and for writing your homework. I really appreciate it!
See you in class~ :)

-T. Nikki :)


When I think of my ideal life, I can think of where I live on the top of my head.
>> When I think about my ideal life, the place where I would like to live is at the top of my head. 
My father has always said that getting my own home is most important thing. So, when I grow up and earn enough money to buy house.
>>  My father always says that getting my own house is the most important thing. So, when I grow up and earn enough money to buy one.
I want to live where I can swim once a day and have barbecue party with my friends. Also, the house has to be filled with board games that I can play with.
>> I want to live where I can swim once a day and have a barbecue party with my friends. Also, the house has to be filled with board games that we can play with.
Now I don’t have my dream job or what I want to become, but I want to earn money what I really like to do and eager to. 
>> Now, I still cannot think of my dream job or what I want to become, but what I am really eager to do now is earn some money. 
Earning money by doing what I like will be one of my ideal life.
>> Earning money by doing what I like is part of my ideal life.
Also, I want to fall in love with who really likes me and the people who can give good energy to each other. 
>> Also, I want to fall in love with someone who really likes me and be surrounded by people who bring positive energy. 
If I have a boyfriend, I want to travel lots of countries I haven’t been and also Spain that I really want to visit.
>> If I'll have a boyfriend someday, I want us to travel to different countries that we've never been to. Also, we will visit Spain which is the country that I personally like to travel to. 
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