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담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
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Homework

작성자: 김*우
2023-06-20 459

회원님의 영작문

Hi.
I had a great day.
The profit for today was good, so that Dr.MJ didn't bother me.
Also, there were enough prescription and it may cause the happiness of the pharmacist.
Actually, there's been a problem with the water pressure for a long time.
A man who is a professional about waterwork came to our clinic this morning, and he analyzed the problem.
He found the defect and fixed it.
Thus, it also made me so happy.
Tomorrow is my day off, and also my kids' birthday.
Irene and Rachel have a same birthday.
We are going to the amusement park "Lotte world" which locates in Seoul tomorrow.
There was only one bad news.
I heard that my mother fought with father seriously.
However, time will solve the problem as always, I think.
When my staff is tardy, they usually say "I am very sick. I have an abdominal pain".
I am not sure if it is true or not.
However, repetative tardness means that she or he doesn't fit with our clinic.
I am starving.
After eating something, I should go to bed.
See you.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hello, Dr. Kim!

Kudos to your high profit today! You gave Dr. MJ one fun Tuesday day off. The more you serve, the better the pharmacy also benefits from your prescriptions. Both your profits align when you have a good performance in a day.

I guess its your lucky day. Your water pressure also got contained. This is another reason to celebrate.

Most importantly, it is quite interesting that your daughters' birthdays fall on the same date. What a coincidence! Have so much fun under the heat of the summer sun with your two daughters then.

I agree that your parents will patch things up soon.

Finally, abdominal and headaches are very tricky. When they are used as reasons for absences, they may be hard to contend with. However, we can be familiar with people's patterns and practices, thus, letting go of an employee who is frequently tardy is just and wise.

Most of your sentences are correct, congratulations! You can almost perfect your compositions after a year of writing. Carry on the excellent work!

-T. Donna~

Hi.
>> Correct!

I had a great day.
>> Correct!

The profit for today was good, so that Dr.MJ didn't bother me.
>> Correct!

Also, there were enough prescription and it may cause the happiness of the pharmacist.
>> Correct!
Or: Also, there were enough prescriptions and it may cause the happiness of the pharmacists.

Actually, there's been a problem with the water pressure for a long time.
>> Correct!

A man who is a professional about waterwork came to our clinic this morning, and he analyzed the problem.
>> Correct!

He found the defect and fixed it.
>> Correct!

Thus, it also made me so happy.
>> Correct!

Tomorrow is my day off, and also my kids' birthday.
>> Correct!

Irene and Rachel have a same birthday.
>> Correct!

We are going to the amusement park "Lotte world" which locates in Seoul tomorrow.
>> We are going to the amusement park, "Lotte World" which is located in Seoul tomorrow.

There was only one bad news.
>> Correct!

I heard that my mother fought with father seriously.
>> Correct!

However, time will solve the problem as always, I think.
>> Correct!

When my staff is tardy, they usually say "I am very sick. I have an abdominal pain".
>> Correct!

I am not sure if it is true or not.
>> Correct!

However, repetative tardness means that she or he doesn't fit with our clinic.
>> Correct!

I am starving.
>> Correct!

After eating something, I should go to bed.
>> Correct!

See you.
>> Correct!

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