무료 레벨테스트 받고 강사평가 남기면 1,OOO원 쿠폰 즉시 적립!

혹시 사이트에선 찾지 못한 궁금한 점이 있으세요?
남겨주신 이메일을 통해 답변 드리겠습니다.

문의하신 내용이 문자로 발송되오니
연락처를 남겨주세요.
업무시간 월~금 오전9시~오후6시
(점심시간 낮12시~오후1시)

영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

Homework

작성자: 김*우
2023-06-18 804

회원님의 영작문

Good afternoon.
How was your weekend?
Since the profit for yesterday was bad, Dr. MJ and counselling managers were nervous all day.
Today's profit is not bad, nevertheless, Dr. MJ felt so bad.
That's because he wants that today's profit should compensate with yesterday's loss.
Meanwhile, I have an experience that I was absent from work.
When I worked in public health clinic, I drank a lot every night.
Because, workloading was relatively low for me and I was younger than now.
One day, I drank so much than usual.
Next day, I couldn't wake up, even couldn't received the call from the staff.
The staff tried to call me numerous times.
At that time, I was married, but my wife and I lived seperately, because we didn't have a child and she worked far away from me.
That's why the staff called my wife, and my wife called the guard of my house, and then the guard unlocked the door and waked me up directly.
So, I went to the workplace immediately, but I was too late, almost absent.
See you.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Good evening, Dr. Kim!

My weekend was a total blast, thank you for asking. And yours? 

Pretty much, it seems that profit makes the world go round. After all, it is the obvious measurement of your work efficiency and effectivity. While it is true that patients with diseases derive less profit, it may be crucial to treat and serve everyone to the best you can. I wish you rocketing profit next week.

Meanwhile, absence from work means unauthorized absence from work place, late attendance or leaving the place of work early without permission either orally or in black and white. Bosses and employees alike inevitably commit an absence due to unforeseen or unfortunate events. It seems that drinking has been one of your favorite past time ever since. Now, you just drink at home and nothing like the experience you gave has to happen. ^^ It is amazing that you still went to work in spite of all what had happened.

I was absent when I gave birth, when my parents died, or when there is an event to emcee. All the rest of the days, I report to work- Christmas, when I am feeling under the weather, or for any other reason other than death, giving birth, or emceeing an event. I guess I can also say I am somehow diligent in going to work.

Kindly go over my suggestions. The use of 'the' is more frequently present in the English language to function as a determiner whether the noun is specific or non-specific. Sometimes however, when we place 'the' and it is not needed, the sentence appears more awkward than the nouns that you may fail to put it. 

You have written  your experiences in a clear and grammatically correct sentences, excellent job!

-T. Donna~ 

Good afternoon.
>> Correct!

How was your weekend?
>> Correct!

Since the profit for yesterday was bad, Dr. MJ and counselling managers were nervous all day.
>> Since the profit for yesterday was bad, Dr. MJ and the counselling managers were nervous all day.

Today's profit is not bad, nevertheless, Dr. MJ felt so bad.
>> Correct!
Or: Today's profit is not bad, nevertheless, Dr. MJ still felt so bad.

That's because he wants that today's profit should compensate with yesterday's loss.
>> Correct!

Meanwhile, I have an experience that I was absent from work.
>> Correct!

When I worked in public health clinic, I drank a lot every night.
>> When I worked in the public health clinic, I drank a lot every night.

Because, workloading was relatively low for me and I was younger than now.
>>That time, the work load was relatively low for me and I was younger than now.

One day, I drank so much than usual.
>> Correct!

Next day, I couldn't wake up, even couldn't received the call from the staff.
>> The next day, I couldn't wake up, and I even couldn't receive the call from the staff.

The staff tried to call me numerous times.
>> Correct!

At that time, I was married, but my wife and I lived seperately, because we didn't have a child and she worked far away from me.
>> Correct!

That's why the staff called my wife, and my wife called the guard of my house, and then the guard unlocked the door and waked me up directly.
>> Correct!

So, I went to the workplace immediately, but I was too late, almost absent.
>> Correct!

See you.
>> Correct!
번호 제목 글쓴이 공개 상태 등록일 조회수
131764 Letter 권*정 완료 2023-10-19 1
131763 What I do to stay healthy 류*원 완료 2023-10-19 1
131762 My Favorite sport 류*원 완료 2023-10-19 2
131761 What are the benefits of eating out? 신*정 완료 2023-10-19 1478
131760 Do you have any sentimental or special clothing items with... 이*윤 완료 2023-10-19 1328
131759 homework_231018 한*록 완료 2023-10-19 1424
131758 231017- Homework 양*애 완료 2023-10-18 1
131757 Migrate country 최*환 완료 2023-10-18 1561
131756 Is there anything you want your country to turn into a crime or... 김*민 완료 2023-10-18 1
131755 Homework 김*님 완료 2023-10-18 1039
131754 Before I go to bed 강*율 완료 2023-10-18 2
131753 homework 김*연 완료 2023-10-18 1857
131752 homework 10.18 최*� 완료 2023-10-18 2158
131751 Home 권*미 완료 2023-10-18 0
131750 homework 이*숙 완료 2023-10-18 1938
131749 WRITING TASK: How do you plan for the future? 임*지 완료 2023-10-18 4
131748 homework 이*숙 완료 2023-10-18 1442
131747 Are the world’s oceans in danger? How can we protect them? 에*미 완료 2023-10-18 0
131746 What is the implication of having an aging population? 권*희 완료 2023-10-18 2377
131745 Do you like mixing colors? Why? 최*한 완료 2023-10-18 2979

HOW TO USE IT?

[마이페이지 > 수업 내용 보기 > 학습 캘린더 > 영작교정 버튼 클릭]

수업 횟수만큼 영작교정 게시판이 생성되며,
지난 날짜에도 게시 할 수 있습니다.

주5회 수업 : 월 20회 이용 가능
주3회 수업 : 월 12회 이용 가능
주2회 수업 : 월 08회 이용 가능
01
교정 내용은 최대 1,000byte까지 올릴 수 있습니다.

첨부 파일은 원활한 첨삭을 위한 참고자료로 사용될 뿐,
파일에 대한 첨삭은 불가능 합니다.

업로드 가능한 첨부 파일은 최대 2mb까지이며,
첨부 할 수 있는 파일 형식은 다음과 같습니다.

문서 - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
이미지 - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
전문 분야를 제외한 회원님이 직접 작성한 글만
첨삭이 가능하며,

올려주신 글의 강사님 첨삭은 24시간 이내에
완료 되는 것을 원칙으로 하고 있습니다.
03
하루 게시 가능한 글은 3회까지 이며,
종료된 수업의 영작교정 게시판은
이용이 어려운 점 양해 부탁 드립니다.
04

와이즈에듀케이션아이(주) 사이트명: 파워잉글리쉬 대표이사 전상현
사업자등록번호: 217-81-44736 통신판매신고번호: 2014-서울도봉-0233호
서울본사: 서울시 노원구 한글비석로 245 두타빌 B동 7층 713호
대표번호 1688-8672 개인정보관리 책임자: 안희영 [powerenglish@pweng.net]