¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¿ì
2023-06-07 680

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Hello, T.Donna.
I was somewhat busy today, but there was nothing special.
You know what?
Dr. MJ and I decided not to attend the morning conference anymore a few days ago.
We intended that our senior manager took part of the chair man of the conference instead of us.
Actually we couldn't be satisfied with her, however, we have seen no more resignation at least.
She is about ten years older than me, but she is good at her work.
Because of Dr.MJ, she almost resigned many times, but now, she has a confidence and affection with her work.
I can't help but respect her.
In spite of her old age, she overcame much pressure, especially from Dr. MJ.
She looks so happy these days, and it makes me happy too.
As a doctor, I want to be a No1 in our city.
However, financial freedom is more important for me.
Maybe I can teach many young doctors someday if I can have more time.
After paying back my debt, I can donate some of money to poor people.
But, now I can't imagine the future in detail.
See you.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good day once again, Dr. Kim!

Being represented by someone you trust and has proven her worth give you pride and joy as business owners. Inevitably, young people look up to the older ones for wisdom and experience. As their leader, you can see how much positive impact she brings in your clinic. Since she is already old, she wants a stable income as well as attain a better working attitude to get through all adversities at work. I admire her for chewing the words od Dr. MJ like bullets and staying teachable.

By achieving financial independence, you will not only have greater control over your future but also the freedom and flexibility to pursue your own passions and interests.  When you're financially secure you can give your children a great start in life. You'll also be leading by example as you teach them the meaning of financial stability.

Congratulations in getting all correct sentences! I have a few suggestions but they are only to improve the structure of your work. Thank you for always submitting quality work!

See you!

-T. Donna~

Hello, T.Donna.
>> Correct!

I was somewhat busy today, but there was nothing special.
>> Correct!

You know what?
>> Correct!

Dr. MJ and I decided not to attend the morning conference anymore a few days ago.
>> Correct!

We intended that our senior manager took part of the chair man of the conference instead of us.
>> Correct!
Or: We intended that our senior manager will represent us as chair man of the conference.

Actually we couldn't be satisfied with her, however, we have seen no more resignation at least.
>> Correct!

She is about ten years older than me, but she is good at her work.
>> Correct!

Because of Dr.MJ, she almost resigned many times, but now, she has a confidence and affection with her work.
>> Correct!

I can't help but respect her.
>> Correct!

In spite of her old age, she overcame much pressure, especially from Dr. MJ.
>> Correct!

She looks so happy these days, and it makes me happy too.
>> Correct!

As a doctor, I want to be a No1 in our city.
>> Correct!
Or: number one/ No.1

However, financial freedom is more important for me.
>> Correct!

Maybe I can teach many young doctors someday if I can have more time.
>> Correct!

After paying back my debt, I can donate some of money to poor people.
>> Correct!

But, now I can't imagine the future in detail.
>> Correct!

See you.
>> Correct!

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
128746 ¿µÀÛ ¼÷Á¦ ÀÌ*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-06-08 0
128745 What are some ways that artificial intelligence could be used to... ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-06-08 4
128744 My favorite movie ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-06-08 181
128743 homework ¾È*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-08 265
128742 What is your favorite month and why? ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-06-08 433
128741 Homework ±è*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-08 381
128740 6/8 homework ÃÖ*º½ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-08 534
128739 When you were little, what was your favorite thing to do? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-06-08 166
128738 Rock and roll!! ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-06-08 198
128737 What house chores do you do? ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-06-08 1
128736 What does a holiday mean to you? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-08 429
128735 How much money do you think a grade schooler should receive as... Le* ¿Ï·á 2023-06-08 321
128734 Why do you think it\'s easier to have bad habits than good ones? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-08 169
128733 Have you ever thought of giving up your holiday due to... Le* ¿Ï·á 2023-06-08 471
128732 I am a angry bird ±è*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-08 1
128731 Writing Task 0607 À¯*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-08 2
128730 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-08 1
128729 What advice can you give to people who are depressed? Do you... ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-08 331
128728 How do you know when to stop eating? Is it easy to eat too much? ÀÌ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2023-06-08 289
128727 Homework ¿À*ºó ¿Ï·á 2023-06-08 0

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04