¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Do you think sleep is important? Why or why not?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*°æ
2023-06-07 856

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Sleeping is one of the essential and vital things to keep us healthy physically and mentally. We sometimes find somebody more cranky or grumpy out of his character because of lacking sleeping time, which doesn't do well for them. Enough sleep can ensure that you can concentrate on business and studying so that you can fulfill great achievements. Therefore, you can't overemphasize the importance of enough sleep.
Some people who consider sleep as nothing good for anything try to reduce their sleeping time for more productivity. However, the truth is far from it. We humans can only recover, get animated, and even be inspired during sleeping time physically and mentally. So as the oriental old saying goes, sleep is like a step backward for two steps forward afterward, that is sleep is worthwhile investing your precious time in your life.
I want to advise you to sleep as much as you can because there are so many people suffering from insomnia, You should enjoy sleeping while you can.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Steve!
Your composition is impressive. Continue your good progress. See you later!
~T. Demi ^^
Sleeping is one of the essential and vital things to keep us healthy physically and mentally. 
CORRECT!
OR>> Sleeping is one of the essential things to keep us healthy physically and mentally.
We sometimes find somebody more cranky or grumpy out of his character because of lacking sleeping time, which doesn't do well for them. 
CORRECT!
OR>> We sometimes find somebody more grumpy out of his character because of sleep deprivation, which doesn't do well for them. 
Enough sleep can ensure that you can concentrate on business and studying so that you can fulfill great achievements. 
CORRECT!
OR>> Enough sleep can ensure that you can concentrate on your business or studies to fulfill outstanding achievements.
Therefore, you can't overemphasize the importance of enough sleep.
>> CORRECT!
Some people who consider sleep as nothing good for anything try to reduce their sleeping time for more productivity. 
CORRECT!
OR>> Some people who consider sleeping insignificant try to reduce their sleeping time for more productivity. 
However, the truth is far from it. 
>> CORRECT!
We humans can only recover, get animated, and even be inspired during sleeping time physically and mentally. 
>> We humans can only recover, get animated, and be even inspired during sleeping time physically and mentally. 
So as the oriental old saying goes, sleep is like a step backward for two steps forward afterward, that is sleep is worthwhile investing your precious time in your life.
CORRECT!
OR>> So as the oriental old saying goes, sleep is like a step backward for two steps forward afterward, indicating that sleep is worthwhile investing your precious time in your life.
I want to advise you to sleep as much as you can because there are so many people suffering from insomnia, You should enjoy sleeping while you can.
CORRECT!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
125877 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-22 1
125876 Sentences ¹é*¾ð ¿Ï·á 2023-02-22 3
125875 enrichment Àå*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-02-22 321
125874 2/22 homework ÃÖ*º½ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-22 381
125873 HOMEWORK È«*¼± ¿Ï·á 2023-02-22 3
125872 [Homework] Have you ever given or received flowers? How did you... ¹Ú*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-22 1
125871 Talking about first meeting with a foreign prospective partner. ±Ç*ÀÏ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-22 6
125870 Are you confident ? ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-02-22 328
125869 The best time to study ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-22 320
125868 2/22 °í*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-02-22 3
125867 Thank you so much ÃÖ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-22 29
125866 Homework ¿À*ºó ¿Ï·á 2023-02-22 1
125865 Homework ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-02-21 2
125864 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-02-21 736
125863 Homework ¹è*Çý ¿Ï·á 2023-02-21 556
125862 Thank you! ÃÖ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-21 6
125861 Of the things you have bought in your life while traveling,... ¾ç*Àº ¿Ï·á 2023-02-21 762
125860 Fly little one ÃÖ*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-02-21 9
125859 Want to live in Vancouver ±¸*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-02-21 7
125858 typical animal in south korea ¹Ú*º° ¿Ï·á 2023-02-21 303

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04