¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Fantastic Jeju island

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÃÖ*ȯ
2023-06-02 355

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

My most memorable trip was Jeju island.Jeju island is located in the southern part of Korea and one of the most beautiful places in Korea.Jeju always makes me relax and happy.Because there are so nice sceneries and good food.I enjoyed riding a motorbike along the coastal road with my friends.It made me feel free and cool.And I hiked the hanla mountain which is the highest mountain in South Korea in the winter season.I could not forget the mountain with the snow and ate instant noodles on the top of the mountain.Finally, I went to a carbonate spa. The carbonate water was to relax my body and soul. After the spa I ate pork belly(bacon) which is one of regional product called black pig in Jeju.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Thomas! Thank you for this. I am sure that you will do very well in English if you continue to do good work as you have been doing.

-Teacher Joy
My most memorable trip was Jeju island.
>>My most memorable trip was to Jeju Island.
Jeju island is located in the southern part of Korea and one of the most beautiful places in Korea.
>>Jeju Island is located in the southern part of Korea and is one of the most beautiful places in Korea.
Jeju always makes me relax and happy Because there are so nice sceneries and good food.
>>Jeju always makes me feel relaxed and happy because of its nice scenery and good food.
I enjoyed riding a motorbike along the coastal road with my friends.
>> I enjoyed riding a motorbike along the coastal road with my friends.
It made me feel free and cool.
>> Correct
And I hiked the hanla mountain which is the highest mountain in South Korea in the winter season.
>> I also hiked Hanla Mountain, which is the highest mountain in South Korea, during the winter season.
I could not forget the mountain with the snow and ate instant noodles on the top of the mountain.
>> I will never forget the mountain covered in snow and eating instant noodles at the top.
Finally, I went to a carbonate spa. 
>> Finally, I visited a carbonate spa.
The carbonate water was to relax my body and soul.
>> The carbonate water helped relax my body and soul.
After the spa I ate pork belly(bacon) which is one regional product called black pig in Jeju.
>> After the spa, I ate pork belly (bacon), which is a regional specialty called black pig in Jeju.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
129110 What are some effective measures social media platforms can... ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-06-27 1218
129109 How can media contribute to overcoming societal divisions? ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-06-27 1372
129108 What is your opinion about the rising number of young people... ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-06-27 1104
129107 What are the disadvantages and advantages of online education? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-06-27 1962
129106 Do you like shopping? Offline or online? ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-06-27 1
129105 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-27 1
129104 writing exercise ¼­*ÅÃ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-27 1093
129103 6/27 homework ÃÖ*º½ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-27 1703
129102 Writing Task 0626 À¯*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-27 1
129101 How good are you at playing sports? How could you be better? Áö* ¿Ï·á 2023-06-27 1
129100 WRITING TASK: What advice would you give to people starting in... ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-06-27 1
129099 The best thing about Korea ±è*¸² ¿Ï·á 2023-06-27 2147
129098 What are your first-day expectations at work? Share your answer... ¹Ú*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-27 1885
129097 Homework È«*¼± ¿Ï·á 2023-06-27 1
129096 energy ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-27 1468
129095 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-27 1638
129094 26.Jun.2023 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-27 1
129093 HOMEWORK2 ÀÌ*½Â ¿Ï·á 2023-06-27 0
129092 Myhomework Àü*¼± ¿Ï·á 2023-06-27 1212
129091 homework 06.26 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2023-06-26 945

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04