¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Fantastic Jeju island

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÃÖ*ȯ
2023-06-02 1049

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

My most memorable trip was Jeju island.Jeju island is located in the southern part of Korea and one of the most beautiful places in Korea.Jeju always makes me relax and happy.Because there are so nice sceneries and good food.I enjoyed riding a motorbike along the coastal road with my friends.It made me feel free and cool.And I hiked the hanla mountain which is the highest mountain in South Korea in the winter season.I could not forget the mountain with the snow and ate instant noodles on the top of the mountain.Finally, I went to a carbonate spa. The carbonate water was to relax my body and soul. After the spa I ate pork belly(bacon) which is one of regional product called black pig in Jeju.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Thomas! Thank you for this. I am sure that you will do very well in English if you continue to do good work as you have been doing.

-Teacher Joy
My most memorable trip was Jeju island.
>>My most memorable trip was to Jeju Island.
Jeju island is located in the southern part of Korea and one of the most beautiful places in Korea.
>>Jeju Island is located in the southern part of Korea and is one of the most beautiful places in Korea.
Jeju always makes me relax and happy Because there are so nice sceneries and good food.
>>Jeju always makes me feel relaxed and happy because of its nice scenery and good food.
I enjoyed riding a motorbike along the coastal road with my friends.
>> I enjoyed riding a motorbike along the coastal road with my friends.
It made me feel free and cool.
>> Correct
And I hiked the hanla mountain which is the highest mountain in South Korea in the winter season.
>> I also hiked Hanla Mountain, which is the highest mountain in South Korea, during the winter season.
I could not forget the mountain with the snow and ate instant noodles on the top of the mountain.
>> I will never forget the mountain covered in snow and eating instant noodles at the top.
Finally, I went to a carbonate spa. 
>> Finally, I visited a carbonate spa.
The carbonate water was to relax my body and soul.
>> The carbonate water helped relax my body and soul.
After the spa I ate pork belly(bacon) which is one regional product called black pig in Jeju.
>> After the spa, I ate pork belly (bacon), which is a regional specialty called black pig in Jeju.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
131851 HOMEWORK: Please write a short paragraph about ¡°What are the... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-10-23 2
131850 Homework ±è* ¿Ï·á 2023-10-23 2
131849 What are the toughest jobs in the world? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-10-23 1742
131848 > Do you agree that hand written letters are considered more... ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-23 2622
131847 What are some alternative ways to enjoy Halloween or other big... ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-23 1
131846 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-10-23 0
131845 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-10-23 0
131844 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-10-23 1869
131843 WRITING TASK: Why is \'planning\' important? ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-10-23 4
131842 A role model ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-10-23 2686
131841 Myeongseongsan ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-23 1717
131840 diary ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-23 1
131839 If you could live anywhere else, where would that be? ±Ç*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-10-23 1271
131838 Homework - \'earliest memory\' ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-23 1722
131837 What do you want to include in your ideal fitness program? ½Å*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-23 1759
131836 Homework Á¤*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-23 989
131835 service ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-23 1338
131834 HOMEWORK ±è*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-10-23 1525
131833 20.Oct.2023 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-23 2
131832 HOMEWORK ±è*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-10-23 1470

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04