¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Fantastic Jeju island

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÃÖ*ȯ
2023-06-02 1289

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

My most memorable trip was Jeju island.Jeju island is located in the southern part of Korea and one of the most beautiful places in Korea.Jeju always makes me relax and happy.Because there are so nice sceneries and good food.I enjoyed riding a motorbike along the coastal road with my friends.It made me feel free and cool.And I hiked the hanla mountain which is the highest mountain in South Korea in the winter season.I could not forget the mountain with the snow and ate instant noodles on the top of the mountain.Finally, I went to a carbonate spa. The carbonate water was to relax my body and soul. After the spa I ate pork belly(bacon) which is one of regional product called black pig in Jeju.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Thomas! Thank you for this. I am sure that you will do very well in English if you continue to do good work as you have been doing.

-Teacher Joy
My most memorable trip was Jeju island.
>>My most memorable trip was to Jeju Island.
Jeju island is located in the southern part of Korea and one of the most beautiful places in Korea.
>>Jeju Island is located in the southern part of Korea and is one of the most beautiful places in Korea.
Jeju always makes me relax and happy Because there are so nice sceneries and good food.
>>Jeju always makes me feel relaxed and happy because of its nice scenery and good food.
I enjoyed riding a motorbike along the coastal road with my friends.
>> I enjoyed riding a motorbike along the coastal road with my friends.
It made me feel free and cool.
>> Correct
And I hiked the hanla mountain which is the highest mountain in South Korea in the winter season.
>> I also hiked Hanla Mountain, which is the highest mountain in South Korea, during the winter season.
I could not forget the mountain with the snow and ate instant noodles on the top of the mountain.
>> I will never forget the mountain covered in snow and eating instant noodles at the top.
Finally, I went to a carbonate spa. 
>> Finally, I visited a carbonate spa.
The carbonate water was to relax my body and soul.
>> The carbonate water helped relax my body and soul.
After the spa I ate pork belly(bacon) which is one regional product called black pig in Jeju.
>> After the spa, I ate pork belly (bacon), which is a regional specialty called black pig in Jeju.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
134379 homwork ¹Ú*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-01 1873
134378 Do you think the immediacy of news on television is crucial, or... ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-01 1788
134377 How can being a member of an organization be advantageous? À±*ºó ¿Ï·á 2024-02-01 1897
134376 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-01-31 1847
134375 Homework ±è*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2024-01-31 1718
134374 homework 01.31 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2024-01-31 1238
134373 What could be the solution for the decline of the birth rate in... Ȳ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-01-31 2426
134372 How can we find other ways ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-01-31 0
134371 About the Drama and the movie °í*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-01-31 2229
134370 What is the hardest thing about being a kid? ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-01-31 1268
134369 homework ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2024-01-31 1125
134368 homework ±è*¸° ¿Ï·á 2024-01-31 1
134367 Possible reasons ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-01-31 1407
134366 Necessity ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-01-31 1
134365 How do you manage time when you have a lot of activities to do? ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-01-31 1100
134364 homework 2024-01-31 ÀÌ*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2024-01-31 1
134363 Learning about the past has no value for those of us living in... Á¤*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2024-01-31 1448
134362 HOMEWORK: Please write a short paragraph about \"What is your... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2024-01-31 1
134361 What healthy habits do you have (such as washing your hands... ¼­*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-01-31 2022
134360 Would you prefer to be the most beautiful person in the room or... ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-01-31 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04