¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

War

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¾ç*¿¬
2023-06-01 540

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I learned about many wars including World War 1 and the second World War in history classes. And I realized most of the wars were associated with strong interest. Wars related with resources, wars over some territory, and wars to get more colonies. Of course ,throughout all the history there were many wars for independence or social justice. Though, we can see some countries wage wars for their benefit or wealth. I think those countries will be destroyed and lost their precious cultural heritage.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good day, Miss Ki Yeon!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille


I learned about many wars including World War 1 and the second World War in history classes.
>> CORRECT! 
OR >> I learned about many wars including First World War and the Second World War in history classes.
And I realized most of the wars were associated with strong interest. 
>> CORRECT! 
Wars related with resources, wars over some territory, and wars to get more colonies. 
>> Examples of these wars are related to resources, wars over some territory, and wars to get more colonies. 
Of course, throughout all the history there were many wars for independence or social justice.
>> CORRECT! 
Though, we can see some countries wage wars for their benefit or wealth. 
>> CORRECT! 
I think those countries will be destroyed and lost their precious cultural heritage.
>> CORRECT! 

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
130687 Homework JA*UNG CHUNG ¿Ï·á 2023-09-01 1195
130686 HOMEWORK: Writing Exercise: How do you stay motivated during... ¼­*ÅÃ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-01 752
130685 HOMEWORK: Writing Exercise: What is the most difficult job in... ¼­*ÅÃ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-01 775
130684 HOMEWORK: Writing Exercise: Describe the best character from... ¼­*ÅÃ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-01 732
130683 WRITING TASK: What do you want to buy these days? ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-09-01 4
130682 What animals are going extinct because of human activities and... ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-01 771
130681 food ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-01 1020
130680 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-01 677
130679 Homework ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-09-01 839
130678 How do you feel about service dogs and their role in society? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-09-01 1
130677 How necessary is internet in this modern time? ÃÖ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2023-09-01 693
130676 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-08-31 619
130675 Next girl friend ÃÖ*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-31 792
130674 homework 08.31 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2023-08-31 925
130673 Do you worry about where the food you eat comes from? ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-08-31 2
130672 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-08-31 0
130671 Would you rather eat pizza or scrambled eggs for breakfast? ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-08-31 1398
130670 Homework ¼Û*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-31 749
130669 Would you rather eat pizza or scambeld eggs for breakfast?... ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-08-31 741
130668 Homework ¼Û*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-31 713

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04