¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework 05.29

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÃÖ*Ç
2023-05-29 622

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
What are the effects of illegal logging?

Illegal logging has a various problems.
Wild animals homes disappear and ecosystems are destroyed.
The Amazon is one of the largest forests on Earth, is now one of the place to illegally logging.
I saw a news about Amazon forests that 150 soccer fields are disappearing every hour.
Doing illegal logging people are only for tree harvesting and they don't care about forest protection.
Destruction of forest, the number of animals is disappearing and the Earth become abnormal climate
and air quality are also getting worse.
I heard that the solution is not yet.
In my opinion, conservation of nature will be difficult in reality.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good day, Keon!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille


~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
What are the effects of illegal logging?


Illegal logging has a various problems.
>> CORRECT! 
Wild animals homes disappear and ecosystems are destroyed.
>> Wild animals' homes disappear and ecosystems are destroyed.
The Amazon is one of the largest forests on Earth, is now one of the place to illegally logging.
>> The Amazon is one of the largest forests on Earth, is now one of the place to do illegal logging.
I saw a news about Amazon forests that 150 soccer fields are disappearing every hour.
>> I saw a news about the Amazon rainforests that 150 soccer fields are disappearing every hour.
Doing illegal logging people are only for tree harvesting and they don't care about forest protection.
>> Illegal loggers are only for tree harvesting and they don't care about forest protection.
Destruction of forest, the number of animals is disappearing and the Earth become abnormal climate
and air quality are also getting worse.
>> Because of deforestation, the number of animals is disappearing, the Earth experiences an abnormal climateand the air quality is also getting worse.
I heard that the solution is not yet.
>> I heard that there's no solution for it yet.
In my opinion, conservation of nature will be difficult in reality.
>> CORRECT! 

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
129524 Writing task ¾È*Çü ¿Ï·á 2023-07-14 1553
129523 7.11.Tue Ȳ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-07-14 2368
129522 Day3 ½Å*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-07-14 0
129521 7/14 °í*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-07-14 19
129520 Homework È«*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-07-14 2
129519 What do you think about eating disorders such as Anorexia and... ¾ö*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-14 1856
129518 What quality do you admire most in people and which one do you... ¾È*½Ò ¿Ï·á 2023-07-14 1846
129517 Home work ±è*¶õ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-13 2
129516 homework 07.13 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2023-07-13 1574
129515 What pet do you have at home? ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-07-13 2630
129514 Home work ±è* ¿Ï·á 2023-07-13 0
129513 What makes you feel happy? ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-13 0
129512 Where is the best place to rest in your house? ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-07-13 1583
129511 Homework ±è*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-13 1226
129510 homework Àå*¼® ¿Ï·á 2023-07-13 1234
129509 Sports ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-13 1
129508 2023.7.13 homework ±è*»è ¿Ï·á 2023-07-13 2995
129507 WRITING TASK: What are your ways to study more effectively? ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-07-13 2
129506 What are you really good at doing? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-07-13 2403
129505 How can daily life support services positively impact the... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-13 2327

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04